One of the elements I’m going to use on this site as part of the big picture, is Game. The thing to understand though is that there is a huge difference between Pick Up Artist (PUA) Game and Married Game. And 98% of what is out there on the internet about Game is about PUA Game, and not Married Game.
Generally the automatic response to even using the word Game in marriage is that the husband is somehow constantly playing mind games on the wife to control and manipulate her into doing things for him. Probably some combination of sex and housework. While such “evil ends” are probably possible in the short term with application of PUA Game on your wife, PUA Game is completely impossible to sustain beyond a few weeks of a relationship. You just run out of material.
PUA Game is all about style; using The Mystery Method as the default assumption for what PUA Game is, PUA is all about carefully prepared sets and routines honed to perfection. Wearing carefully prepared peacocking gear. At the heart of things, its a carefully staged display of the PUA having a high value to mate with. The Display of High Value is the key point.
Married Game is all about substance; rather than attempting special displays of high value, the Married Gamer actually develops high value. The display of such being somewhat incidental. The married man trying to run PUA on his own wife will get a few moments of fun, but she will quickly wise to routines and it will just piss her off if you try and run them on her any further. It’s just not possible to sustain the intensity of PUA methods and succeed.
In case you were reading between the lines and thought I was saying PUA were “fakes”, the answer is “not exactly”. PUA are like Stand Up Comedy – planned routines and very fun, but after an hour, it’s over. Married Game is just like being a guy with a sense of humor. I’m not going to make you laugh for an hour straight, but we are going to have laughter together. PUA are like The Harlem Globetrotters, a whole bunch of planned routines, physical tricks and misdirection’s. The show is awesome, but see the show once or twice, and you’re good for a couple years of not seeing it. Married Game is like being an NBA player, there’s practice, knowing your role, team meetings, schedules, finance and more work outside the spot light than you ever do in it.
The trick for the Married Gamer, is to figure out what can work in marriage from the PUA Game and shamelessly steal it and co-opt it for use.
The key “trick” Married Gamers can learn from PUA is to gain higher value in reality, and acknowledge that the majority of women seek higher status males and respond sexually to them. Women are hypergamous. This why you need to learn about the whole Alpha Male effect. Put bluntly; if you want a better sexual response from your wife, be a better man for her to respond more strongly to. She won’t be able to help herself. Much more to come on the “how” part of the “being a better man”. For now, just know the principle behind nearly everything else.
The trap for the PUA seeking a long term relationship is that they may land a hot babe through their game, but if they cannot back that up with substance, the relationship will fail. If the PUA’s actual value isn’t equaling the display of higher value their PUA Game implied, the girlfriend will eventually wise up and move on with extreme contempt once she discovers that you are not in fact an Alpha Male, just a suboptimal Beta Male who had a funky hat and a cool belt buckle.
Also a concern for the PUA seeking a long term relationship, is that the typical places PUA run Game in, are terrible places to meet a potential wife. Bars and clubs are frequented by only a subset of women, most of whom tend to be more impulsive and self-centered than those that do not regularly attend bars and clubs. Plus PUA will focus on women that respond best to them, by which I mean the ones that drop their panties the fastest. The suggested normal PUA time elapsed from first meeting to sex is supposedly seven hours. (That may be seven hours spread over 3-4 dating occasions, but the time stated in The Mystery Method is seven hours and I’ve not really seen other times offered.) So if you only have seven hours to work with, I think only gaming chicks with lower back tattoos, no sexual morals and drinking is probably the best target group you can go for.
In my opinion, women that are; impulsive, self-centered, bar hopping and easy lays with strange men, just aren’t the talent pool to find a wife from. It’s like getting a cat from an animal shelter, it’s easy to get a cat that way, just don’t complain too much if it pees on the carpet, bites you, and then runs away.