How To Get Your Wife To Shut Up About Her Day

Sometimes women just need to talk about their day. It usually pays to listen and let her decompress. Don’t try to problem solve her day for her unless she explicitly asks for help with something that happened. Just listen, pay attention, nod and smile at the good bits. Usually what she most wants is attention, so treat it like a small stage production and clap for the good bits and boo the villains. Once she’s decompressed a little, she is usually far more receptive to you for the rest of the evening.
Of course, sometimes she does just go on and on and on, and having started listening it can become difficult and impolite to get yourself out of the conversation without looking like you’re flaking on her. Faking a seizure usually gets you out of a couple conversations a month, but beyond that you start looking more and more like a liability to her.
The solution is simple. You simply close the gap between you, pull her into you, and kiss her long and intensely until she loses her entire train of thought. If she wants your attention… she’ll get it lol.
Benedick: “Peace! I will stop your mouth.” [Kisses her.]     William Shakespeare, Much Ado About Nothing, V.iv.111
The kiss is at 2:34  Though watch from about 0:30 to 4:30 best enjoyment.

There’s some interesting stuff on marriage in general in there as well.

Cheaper Than Buying Her Drinks And Three Times As Effective

Cut your nails short and take an emery board and file them smooth.
Wash your hands. Use moisturising lotion and let it sink in.
She probably has everything you need somewhere in her side of the bathroom cabinet already.
Now try and get your hands in her pants…
A little KY Liquid doesn’t hurt either. It’s cheaper than buying her drinks and three times as effective. True Story.

Sexy Move: Breakfast Sans Game

Tonight I just feel awfully tired and worn out. Had a very early start today and a long day followed, tomorrow is a later start and won’t finish until extremely late. I’m not sick but the pollen count is just extreme in Connecticut right now and Sudafed and Claritin make my brain feel fuzzy.
Jennifer and I both work for the same company and have done so for almost our entire marriage. We do work in different departments though and only see each other at work maybe once a week in passing. We both have flexible schedules so that’s a major help with childcare issues. Tomorrow the plan is she’ll get a couple hours of work done and I’ll drop daughter number two off at school, then Jennifer and I will meet each other for breakfast at Friendly’s. After that my long day starts and she’ll have 5-6 hours to run on hers. It’s about as much as we’ll truly see of each other tomorrow until I get home about 9-930pm.
It’s funny that even living together and working for the same place, we have to find the time for each other some days. Work has even been so overwhelming for both of us that for the last year we’re even had to skip on breakfast together for months on end. We do Date Night about once even two months, but breakfast is really what our regular thing has been. Except we haven’t done it very much in like… forever.
Her department finally got the big State contract signed, this was about a six month process that took over a year. My department was meant to be five nurses, but we’ve been running with four forever, then it was three, then for a sick week in March it was just me and my DNS (Darth Nursing Supervisor – though mine is very nice). Today we’re at four, number five returns in two weeks, and six is coming soon. It’s a weird sense of relief and almost confusion of what I’ll actually be doing with full staffing finally.
In a few months daughter number two will finally be a middle schooler – which means the bus comes to the corner at 7:35am and picks her and her sister up and drops them off again at 3:00pm. Which means the endless frenzy to pick up and drop off is coming to a close soon enough. We’ll be able to have breakfast together any day of the week, pretty much whenever we want. It makes me happy, makes us happy.
Don’t get me wrong, I really like the sex. In the tough times that’s always been our lifeboat of togetherness. But I do also like to just sit and talk with her sans game. I just like her. Plus I like bacon.

Sexy Move: Lose Control aka The Barbaric Yawp

Much of what I talk about involves staying in careful control of yourself. Paying attention to what you are doing, why you are doing it, how you are doing it. Being mindful and having a plan. Overall this is a good practice but taken too far can make you a little less playful and animated than you could be.
There’s hardly enough time in one day to work, work out, work on the house, work on a hobby, work on the kid’s homework with them and work her over really good at the end of the day. All work and no play made Jack a dull boy, even if it’s all supposedly Sex Rank building stuff. Don’t forget to relax a little and have fun once in a while.
In the bedroom there’s a lot that can turn into work as well. Am I touching her just right? Is she going to orgasm? I’m doing this then this then that. I’m holding back on cumming because she’s not done yet. How do I look? She’s wearing something frilly to bed so now I gotta make sure this goes really well. We did it her on top the last two times and so I should be on top of her because she likes that but I’m so tired tonight.
A few rounds of that and sex turns into work. And you end up being very controlled in the act of making love. The old Woody Allen joke is that he thought of entire games of baseball when making love to delay cumming too quickly. I think modern guys tend to be so hyper focused on the mechanics of what they are in the middle of doing that they can lose enjoyment of the moment. I’m kissing like that, a little hair pulling like that, a little spank like that, kiss the boobs like that, doing the sexy move to the clit like that… after a while it’s kinda like playing Pussy Hero 4 on the Wii. Just mash the A Button until the meter fills up, and then it’s BBAB then DOWN UP DOWN really quickly to do the Ultimate Finishing Move.
Of course this is all just great for the wife, she gets a great orgasm, but you’re turning into her favorite vibrator. Which isn’t making her feel particularly sexy and desired.
The solution is simple, lose control.
What if she was so unbelievably sexy, you couldn’t control yourself with her? What if you having sex with her were so hot to you that your eyes glazed over and you basically mentally just check out for the entire thing? So just let yourself become a passenger as your body takes over and makes absolutely sure that you only care about one thing – getting semen deep into her vagina. Then once your body is finished with her body, you drift back to proper consciousness.
She may or may not orgasm from that. Frankly it doesn’t matter. She’ll feel sexy and desired though.
And don’t blow it by apologizing either. Try these phrases…
“Wow that was intense.”
“That was amazing, how did you do that to me?”
“I think my balls might hurt a little.”
“Can we not do that more than twice a week please.”
“Holy crap that was just half a tab of Viagra.”
“We’re gonna stay married together forever right.”
“What year is it?”
“I’m starting to like you I think.”
“This was consensual right?”
(Or if you think you can pull it off…)
“I just wanna tell you how I’m feeling
Gotta make you understand
Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you”
I’m not saying you do this every time, that’s going to get a little old after a while, but once in a while it’s going to make her feel sexy and desirable. Which in turn is going to prime her pump for more in the future.
For the most part I tend to work fairly hard on being in control with Jennifer and making sure she orgasms (if she wants it, which is most times), but then there is usually a vague crossing over to this out of control sense. Usually it’s the last 5-30 seconds before I come. On occasion though it’s earlier. There is a small element of acting to make it happen, but also a larger element of just going with it as well.
And when you cum into her, don’t just hold your breath and ejaculate. Make some noise of some sort and thrust hard as you pour into her. Be like tiger. RAWR!
Perhaps even a Barbaric Yawp…

Jennifer Answers Questions

All righty then…it’s Jen here for the first question answering installment.  And now, in random order, a few questions answered…
Were you always like that, or did you notice a change in Athol’s attitude (game) at one specific point in your marriage, and then responded to it?
Weren’t you uncomfortable/resisting against this change from “his old self”?
There was no point in our marriage where I had an “aha moment”.  He has grown and changed, just as I have grown and changed, in a gradual way.  I didn’t see the changes as related to a book he had read or a technique he was experimenting with until later, when he pointed things out to me.  I can definitely see times where he has tried certain things, and I have responded.  For example, when he began experimenting with being more assertive he watched me respond to that in a way that he didn’t necessarily expect.  It was something that he initiated but a dynamic that we played with and changed together.  He has not had some big personality morph from “old self” to “gaming self”, he’s just put more thought into how he relates to me and how our marriage works, which is surely not a bad thing.  I had long ago come to the conclusion that he is the one who initiates and experiments, and I’m happy to go along with 99.9% of it.  (And that’s not in an “I’m putting up with it” kind of way, that’s in a “wooo hoooo!  again!!! again!!!” kind of a way.)
Dear Jennifer,
I really like Athol’s blog, but did the post about him running game on his kid (your daughter) also give you the weirds?
Love, Rosie
Ah yes, the infamous Rainforest Cafe trip.  I think it is more of an observation of human behavior than “running game” in that instance.  Okay, so if you read it through the first time thinking he’s talking about a hot twenty-something that he’s on a date with…then realize it’s his daughter…there is a momentary eeeeewwww.  But re-read with the knowledge that it’s a kid he’s running behavior modification strategies on and see what vibe you get.
Game is really at it’s roots behavioral analysis and behavior modification, which works with people of all ages.  In this case, the example was of how the “game” principles work in a generalized way with anyone…we all want positive attention and we can all read each other’s cues and respond appropriately if we know what to look for.  This blog post (okay edited a bit for a G rating) could actually be useful to me at work as a training tool…I work with foster parents who care for some seriously emotionally and behaviorally disturbed kids, and we teach them behavior modification techniques all the time.  I think that is one reason that I don’t feel like I’m being gamed all the time…in a non-sexual context it’s something I’m very familiar with.
Athol: Jennifer has a few more questions yet to answer, but you’re welcome to keep asking more.