Sexy Move: Have Her Cut Your Hair

One of my favorite nights is Sunday night when Jennifer cuts my hair. Admittedly there’s not a lot of it left – at least not on my head anyway, now that I’m a little older… I… I have to do things that I don’t want to talk about. So anyway rather than do some stupid comb over deal, we just clipper it all off very short each week. She was nervous at first about it, but it’s basically impossible to screw it up. Clippers, my head, neeeerrrroooowwww….
I don’t know exactly why it’s so nice. Maybe it’s some sort of grooming hold over from well before even The Time Before Writing and it’s some sort of primate thing happening. Maybe it’s just nice to be pampered a little. Maybe it’s because she’s serving me. Maybe it’s just the physical sensation and touch. Maybe it’s because I just like to look better. Maybe it’s because from when I was 14 to 17 I had a young cute and very busty hairdresser who used to take a very long time to cut my hair and always ended up somehow rubbing her boobs on my shoulders and upper back as she cut my hair. Seriously I have no clue.
Jennifer on the other hand gets to indulge in that favorite female fantasy of making her man over to look better. Maybe it’s some sort of primate grooming thing on her end too. Plus she gets to tend to the magnificence of me. (I don’t believe it’s possible to be too confident).
So anyway, we both have no clue why this works for us. Somehow it’s very intimate.
So anyway, when you ask her to do this for you, I suggest you frame it this way…
“Honey, I’ve decided that there’s something I want to do and I really want to be able to do it with you. But if you don’t want to do it, I’ll understand and still love you, just understand that I’ve decided I’ll have to see someone else and have them do it. I do love you and aren’t looking for a relationship with anyone else or anything like that. I’ll probably just find someone willing to be paid to do it and not get involved.”
Remember to be smiling a very naughty boy smile as you do this, be playful NOT serious in tone. If you think you’re going to blow it, at least hold the clippers in your hand or be in the store looking at the box or something as a defense prop. So anyway, then you spring that you are in fact looking for a haircut rather than some sort of kinky sex act.
The closing joke line is…
“I mean I could do it myself, but it’s just not the same”.


  1. Jane cuts my hair, I tell her I love it and she thinks I'm crazy. It's nice to know I'm not the only one! I'm with you, Athol, there is something very intimate about it.

    I keep telling her she could save herself some laundry if she cut my hair topless. That doesn't really fly. But you may have something with that primate grooming thing… I'll tell her the girl monkeys don't wear shirts so why should she?

  2. How funny–we did that yesterday, too. My wife has been shaving my head ever since Pulp Fiction came out and we thought Bruce Willis looked cooler with a buzz.

  3. You know, I do do it myself and it feels the same to me..

    Great advice, Athol.

  4. I have repeatedly tried to get my wife to cut my hair, but she is just not interested. For a few years I cut my hair myself, but it really didn't look professional enough (even though my standards there are pretty low). This was one of those examples of my wife wanting me to be more independent and not rely on her to take care of me.

  5. Athol Kay says:

    I'm glad to hear that others like this so much. It's really one of my favorite things.

    @ Mr.B – I was under the impression you were the one taking care of her all the time. If she won't do it for you, then you just have to have someone else do it and enjoy it as much as you can. And yeah I'm talking about hair… but… hmmm…

  6. I cut my husband's hair and my son's. Cutting my husband's is much more enjoyable.

  7. Anonymous says:

    Are you absolutely fucking insane? How does looking like a tramp because it appears you slept by the roadside and the parks and garden department ran over you with a lawnmover increase your sex rank? Unless your wife knows how to cut hair, don't even go there. You wouldn't let her make your clothes, would you? Then why do this? Can we look forward to more posts on how looking like a scarecrow gets you laid?

  8. Athol Kay says:

    Anon – oh to have so much hair that it could be cut badly. I was having buzzed off for $$ for a year or so before I got Jennifer to take over.

  9. Stumbled on a pic today that reminded me of this post, thought I'd share. This is how haircuts OUGHT to be! ;o)

  10. My wife was s stylist and was the only one to cut my hair for 24 years,I loved it and so did she. It was the whole total trust thing, her with the sharp shears and razor, me being totally confident with her having said instruments at my neck and head ;~)I almost lost an ear though when I asked her to marry me. Sadly she left in July, I became too nice a guy, whatever my rank was had diminished enough to make her decide to leave.

  11. I tried cutting my guy’s hair but did not do a very good job. He was patient with me, he had gone a couple months longer than usual for a haircut so there was room for recovery. He has been cutting my long hair for a while now and will continue to do so. But for the sake of our relationship, it is better if I avoid wielding the shears.

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