Reader Story: Updating Sex Life After Serious Injury

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A reader email updating the earlier post.
Hey man, I figured you might want to hear some progress from one of your apprentices. If you will recall from our previous email exchange I was still in the early stages of implementing some of your strategies ,with good success.
Since our email exchange I have managed to surpass my wife’s sex rank for the first time in our relationship. We were teens when we first met, and she was a solid 9 and I was an easy 8 (using our fellow students as the yardstick). Both of our ranks have changed over the years, not coincidentally these changes have taken place during her three pregnancies. I have a tendency to gain pregnancy pounds along with her! During the last few years she has settled down to a 6.5 or so, her skin is still wonderful and face still beautiful, but she has kept on about 30 lbs. of baby weight. I had slid down to a 4 or so during the worst part of my bout with chronic pain, but worked my way back to a 6 in the last couple of years.
Since I have been feeling better I have been hitting the weights and cardio as hard as my back will allow, and I have managed to get the vast majority of my muscle mass back while losing over 8″ on my waist. Just on looks alone I am closing in on my old 8 sex rank, and if we use the men my age and in my community I am definitely an 8.5. I cannot go anywhere without garnering the attention of other women, and have even been complimented by all of the women who are a part of my wife’s life. My wife’s best friend, who graduated in my senior class, recently told me that I look just like I did in high school.
As you know this on its own can be enough to affect the dynamics within a marriage, but I am not just utilizing this aspect of LTR game. I am also being alpha a good 65% of the time. No longer do I ask for sex, just to be left wanting. Now all I have to do is insinuate that I am in the mood (typically by some flirting or the 10 second kiss, but sometimes I just say “lets have sex “) and we are getting down in no time flat. Since the kids have been out of school we have been averaging 4-5 times weekly (if you will recall before discovering your blog we were a once a week, twice a week if I was lucky). I also leave no doubt in her mind who the captain of our family is, but I also make her feel important by getting her input on things that effect our family.
That is not to say that I don’t try and balance the Beta. Primarily my beta behavior is still how much time I spend nurturing our children, but I will occasionally help out in the house by picking up laundry or cooking from time to time. She recently had a surgery, and I have taken on all of her responsibilities, and she appreciates it immensely ( she actually seems to feel a bit guilty about it).
Unfortunately my old nature has reared its ugly head a bit, and I spend way too much time thinking about having sex with women other than my wife, but I will not act on these thoughts. I intentionally avoid overtly flirting with women, and making anything more than small talk. I have not worked so hard to make my marriage great to blow it for strange ass. Paul would say that this is a battle with my flesh, and I tend to agree. Besides I would much rather this problem, than having to worry about my wife stepping out on me.
Thanks again for your blog, I am still a reader, and will continue to do so for as long as you keep writing. Speaking of, make sure to write that book, you have a lot to offer. I will be looking forward to my autographed copy!
Regular guy. Simple plan properly executed. Pure win.


  1. Phil Mueller says:


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