Foreign Women Make The Best Wives?

I’ve read a number of places on game blogs about the idea of simply bypassing marrying an American women due to their sexual hang ups / sluttiness / gold digging / sense of entitlement and marry a foreign woman from a more traditional culture.
I’ve had some minor experience with this.
Back in the good old days of evangelical Christianity I did a short term mission stint in Fiji. Not the touristy Fijian island, but the more heavily populated with ethnically Indian island of Fiji. That’s as in Indian’s transported from India as workers/slaves courtesy of ye olde British Empire. Periodically the Indian group gets the short end of the stick from the more properly Fijian group and while I was there the stick was getting rattled loudly. A few months after I left the military coup went down and the stick came out properly.
Anyway… here’s how a typical attempt at me buying something in a store went…
Buy Me!


  1. Athol, I have been reading a lot about Game, Alpha and Beta. I write from India. From what I understand, being Alpha means simply being a man — nothing more, nothing less. If "Mystery" came here with his hat and eyeliners, he would certainly be considered a freak. Its a sad world when grown ups have to read books in order to meet and mate. So, far the traditional model still holds good for a significant part of the population. But may be, with the spread of women's lib, we also would start sporting eyeliners and top hats. A lot of what is taught as game is nothing but normal male behaviour. Something as simple as couples quarreling and then making up happens in all marriages. My parents quarrel at times, what's the big deal. You quarrel, make up and life goes on. I work in the media, where there are tight deadlines. Hot words are at times exchanged. That does not mean we are mortal enemies. You often don't remember what happened the earlier day. Its the same in marriages. These things happen. Where is the question of pedestalising. The problem arises when mountains are made out of molehills. I think what is needed is normal and realistic behaviour by both men and women. Women expect their husbands to remain Schwarznegger all their lives and men expect their wives to remain Brooke Sheilds at 16 even after two kids. This is not to deny the importance of being fit. But be fit for its own sake, to prevent lifestyle diseases. A daily walk around the park is sufficient for many. I think you would get the jist of what I am saying. I think Game refers to normal male behaviour. Sorry for the long post.

  2. There is some apparent truth to the notion, in that some foreign women, for example Asian women, usually have far less mileage on the clock than an equivalently aged western female, on average, and are less likely to cheat, as well as somewhat easier to please when deciding on a potential marriage partner. This has been confirmed by actual research (no not mine).
    I have to wonder if that isn't related to the general slightly higher intelligence of asians over other races, as other research shows that the marriages of educated (smart?) folk are somewhat more likely to last. Don't know, but there could be a link. If so, you could save yourself the trip by finding a local female of higher intelligence, although separating actual intelligence from credentials can be a tedious task.

    My ex can't walk past a box of kittens. Now they number is the 20's. When my kids come over their clothing often smells like cat p*ss. Fantastic.

  3. PUAs often say that social status in women doesn't matter, but that only applies when everyone you might date is within a certain band of social status.

    When it comes to marriage, gutter fishing in foreign countries won't fit the bill. Better to find a woman with similar social standing, who could roll in your circles back home (cultured enough, educated enough, etc.), and whose family doesn't particularly need the help. Yes, richer and savvier foreign women also have entitlement complexes, but they are not nearly as severe as those found in North American women.

  4. Athol Kay says:

    Agree Kaushik. Game, or at least married/LTR game like I talk about really is just consciously doing normal male behavior. Brilliant choice of words I will be adopting that.

    Tspoon – maybe have the cat situation looked into. There's a basic hygenie issue there.

    Gary – agree as well. My example is somewhat extreme, but game writers talk about marrying foreign women the same way women dream about Prince Charming stumbling across their glass slipper…

  5. Athol Kay says:

    And for the record there is a decent Indian population in New Zealand. I had plenty of Indian friends growing up and so on. Never thought anything of it until my early twenties and one of my sisters friends just vanished back to India to be married without warning.

    I get the whole thing of different culture, but kinda spooky in a way as well.

  6. There is a tendency to romanticize what we don't understand. For instance, when you meet someone new, you can imagine they are all the things you most like until they start proving you wrong. This is why the beginning of a relationship is always the most "romantic" – because you are interacting with your ideal in a way.

    I've heard Russian women mentioned as better than Western women numerous times. The thing is, Russian women are beautiful and feminine, but they are also very smart and tough as nails. They've had to be. The 20th century was hell in Russia and they had to get by with a seriously depleted population of men. The women kept things going. So if you bring over a woman who is smart, beautiful, educated, tough, and willing to forsake her culture, her family, and everything she knows for a better life – well, you can't really expect her to be a geisha girl, can you?
    The culture is broken. People react to the culture, and if the culture is permissive and allows you to take what you want with few consequences, it's not going to take long for the average person to get that – foreign or not. Foreign women are not innately more submissive. You may get one who retains the vaules she was raised with, but you may not.

  7. Anonymous says:

    @tspoon: it all depends on the cultural group you are from. I assume that you are a white guy – a default 8 for Asian women. Being a white man is sufficient to make a lot of Asian women submissive. In the developed Asian society I'm from, the sense of entitlement is even stronger in women than that in N American women. IMAO, 80% of women from the place I'm from are absolutely toxic for LTRs. Conversely, I think N American women are somehow more aprroachable.

    @Athol: Yes you're right. As an immigrant, I dare not to date women from the place I'm from because I can never tell if they love me or they just love my passport!

  8. @Grerp: "if you bring over a woman who is smart, beautiful, educated, tough, and willing to forsake her culture, her family, and everything she knows for a better life – well, you can't really expect her to be a geisha girl, can you?"

    That's a very good point. A likely blind spot for guys who couldn't get a date back home but who now find themselves drunk from female attention in the foreign land. Bottom line is… if you didn't bring any game with you to begin with, then it's quite likely not you and your game that she's after. …But that foreign land is still a very nice environment in which to practice!

    Just be careful how far you run with it. Living single in an exotic Asian land for a while, I saw a number of ex-pat guys take the bait of sleeping with the local girls. Their bliss didn't last long. The next card that gets played by her is one of shame and embarrassment. The girl gives a speech about how she can't go back to her family now. She's been shamed. She's used goods. Her family will disown her, blah, blah, blah. It's a real guilt trip for the guy–and tough to get away from if you're part of a tight foreign community (and on contract to stay).

    I think the shit test here is to say something along the lines of, "Sure baby. I'd LOVE to settle down here in Fiji (or wherever). You can pick out our first dirt-floor hut!" …And see how enthused she is and how long she lasts.

  9. I have been just discussing the foreign woman thing with a couple of friends based on what I see at daycare. My son is often bullied by the white girls in his class. Actually they seem to bully all the boys. They are quite loud, obnoxious and rude to be frank. Their mothers are the same way when dropping them off. I just roll my eyes. Now on the other hand we do have a couple of Asian families that attend and I will say their little girls are quite polite. They wave at my son NICELY and I can usually find them playing together without incident. So maybe marry foreign girls raised here so that you don't have to worry about the visa/passport thing. ;)

  10. Athol Kay says:

    All good points and comments. There are potential pitfalls everywhere for getting involved in serious relationships. The locally based issues ones are better understood and thus percived.

    Even good international marriages have there additional struggles. Jennifer and I are "international" and we basically miss one set of in-laws / grandparents no matter where we live. That's a stressor in and of itself.

    I also left everything to come here, so there's an element of social capital that I've lost as well.

  11. Anonymous says:

    But Athol, you did marry a foreign woman, but you got an American passport as a result. As far as Asians being intelligent, did anyone happen to think that the more intelligent slice of the billion Chinese might be the ones that you are more likely to meet in the US of A? I imagine a lot of peasant farmers back home are of average to below average intelligence.

  12. Athol Kay says:

    I don't have an American Passport. I'm a permanent resident of the America, but remain a New Zealand citizen.

  13. Your story is interesting and very true. As someone who's lived in various Asian countries for extended periods, the men who rant about how American women are so slutty/gold-digging and how foreign brides (always from poor countries, they never mention Western Europe or Australia as a source) are so much better crack me up. They are only displaying their ignorance of the foreigners they praise. Most Asian women are far more mercenary than almost any American, partly (as you point out) by sheer necessity. Also, anyone who thinks Asian women are submissive has never spent time in an actual Asian family.

    A woman from a "nice" family, which one of the commentators suggested as a solution, is almost certainly never going to marry a foreigner (her family would not allow it), unless she is Westernized and willing to defy them (ie no longer traditional).

  14. Athol Kay says:

    Great points Grace. Totally agree.

  15. Anonymous says:

    NAFWALT – Not all foreign women are like that. LOL!

    I am European, I have lived in USA and I live in Central America for ten years. I can tell you that Central American women are better women and better wives than American women. MUCH BETTER.

    European women are more feminist than Central American women but they are still better than American women. No mean to offend, but your women are (mostly) a pain in the ass (with some few exceptions, like Grerp or Athol's wife).

  16. Many of you is ignorant. I am french and my wife is American. She is the most sweet, kind, loyal wife I can ask for. Many french women is also very independent. I think many Americans is mislead and thinks life is a utopia someplace else! Women today unless they having no options don’t want to be is treated like shit by a man! If you want a slave it is your issues not the woman. A decent woman will live and support and respect you if you do the same for her. No woman with any brain or option will do this without you doing it back. If you want a servant it say more about you than women of any country. Maybe you learn how to keep a woman happy you won’t have to blame anyone anymore?

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