Just got a question from a reader that got the “I love you, but I’m not in love with you” speech. Generally I advise that the immediate threat is another man in the picture, so naturally I asked him if that was so. The reply was that he had no concerns about that, everything had been great between them. But she had just started on an SSRI depressant because of anxiety at work. Hence the question, “can SSRIs really kill romance/love”.
Well according to Dr Helen Fisher the worlds foremost authority on romantic love, yes they can damage the ability to feel in love.
I don’t want to say that SSRIs should never be tried because for some people they are needed and do work. But if there is a change in sexual functioning or change in the ability to experience attachment to your loved ones, that needs to be looked at extremely seriously. Anything like this needs to be reported to the prescriber of the medication. Importantly do not stop the medication as you can have a very rough time coming off these medications if you do it too fast.
I’m getting questions from people asking advice about partners with a defunct sex drive that are on SSRIs every week. I had three questions today. The entire point of the medication is to make you more functional rather than less functional.
I’m getting to the point where I think “are you on an SSRI?” is a first date question.
If nothing else… research all the medications you and your loved ones are on. Your best advocate for your health is you.