Life Sucks, The Marriage Still Good

I’ve said a number of times that, “sometimes we win and sometimes we lose, but we win and we lose as a team.”
Jennifer and I are a real couple and our sex life is one of our strongest points. Our other strong point is that we communicate with each other really well, with sort of mental telepathy at times.
Because mental telepathy is probably completely infallible, we assume we never miscommunciate…which means when we do miscommunicate with each other, we can go for months before realizing that a miscommunication has happened.
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  1. Perfect would be boring anyway.


  2. Terry @ Breathing Grace says:

    I second Fred's sentiments.

  3. ironchefoklahoma says:

    Sorry to hear that, Athol. So you and Jennifer aren't the perfect couple? Well, there's a shock! Next you'll be telling us that water is wet?

    Having said that,
    I'd write about the issues in specific, but I don't want people try and dig into the issues…
    Why mention it at all?

  4. @ironchef

    I'm assuming it's to show that Athol's life isn't perfect (and I suppose if you're writing a blog that's basically giving advice on how to improve your relationship and therefore your sex life you don't want to pretend that your own is entirely without fault)

  5. I think it's valuable to share. Some bloggers, and some commentators (even on this site) try too hard to be alpha and come off as full of shit. Some posts essentially state, "My wife just puts supper on the table, is quick with the blow jobs, and keeps her vocabulary to a 'Sir, yes Sir,' because I'm the man and the master of all I survey." I think those posts are actually written by teenagers daydreaming about how they want their marriages to be, after actually making it to second base.

    Owning up to problems makes this blog seem like it's actually rooted in the real world.

  6. I wrote that in part because it's the truth and I want us to been seen as real. The whole Alpha Beta thing really does work in a real marriage. It's not just some BS I made up to flog a book. It's real, we're real.

    In part because I worry that sometimes people reject a perfectly good marriage because it isn't perfect as a fantasy.

  7. You heard "come on my tits", she said "come on, my tits?"? At all?

  8. Athol,
    I appreciate your honesty, because along with your great advice, it has made a huge difference in my marriage. I almost ditched my relationship because it took me a long time to heed your concern: "In part because I worry that sometimes people reject a perfectly good marriage because it isn't perfect as a fantasy." Whatever's going on with you and Jennifer, you'll get through it stronger and your love will mature even more in the process. And the rest of us who hang on your every word will follow that example when conflict inevitably arises in our own marriages.

  9. I know this is asking a lot but you could give perhaps an example situation or something without getting into all the private details? This could be a real "teaching moment" for a lot of guys and gals. Appreciate the work you do…

  10. I'm convinced one's progress in marriage needs to be measured only in the long term. Over the short term we all move two steps forward, one step back.

    And if marriage were easy, everyone would be doing it!

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