Bad Wife Choice: Avoiding a Huge Mistake

Via Facebook message…
“It’s absolutely jaw dropping how much the content from MMSL and Taken in Hand models what the Scriptures say marriage is supposed to be like sans the disciplinary spanking aspect of TIH. However, those three are nothing like what is considered a “Christian Marriage” in today’s standard. I understand that you’re no longer a believer . . .I currently am and this information has been very important in search for a good relationship. Last time I wrote you I was engaged, I’ve since called it off for a myriad of reasons including the fact that I didn’t have peace from God about the situation. In addition to that your blog/site has helped me realize the type of relationship that I REALLY WANT versus just accepting whatever is handed to me. I also realize now how important it is to become the type of man that is necessary to be in what I consider to be a good marriage. In short, thanks again. You helped to save me from making a HUGE mistake!”
I replied:
You are most welcome. I’m not religious anymore, but I do keep having Christians telling me I’m biblical. I just take it as a compliment, but it’s not really something I’m trying to do.
I’m sure the decision you made wasn’t without difficulty and some pain though. I hope you find the one and have as much happiness as Jennifer and I do. And thank you. It really does make a difference to me.
My hunch though… let’s say he’s a 7 and he’s engaged to a 7. After reading MMSL and learning a few more things, he sees a clear path to get to him to be an easy 8 or maybe even a full 9 if he really puts his mind to it. But she’s still going to be a 7 or she’s been resisting his positive changes – a very bad sign of things to come. So the Rationalization Hamster in the Sky makes him feel uncomfortable and he breaks it off. Now he seeks a 9; he deserves one.
Hey I may be wrong, it’s just a hunch, but I’m getting good at this stuff. I’ve also been right there myself, looking at a woman I deeply love, crush hard on and just having that sense of disconnection that something just isn’t right. It pained me to not get involved, but if I had moved on her I know it would have played out badly and I would have never even met Jennifer.
So whether or not you believe in: God, fate, the Rationalization Hamster in the Sky, science, The Force, or whatever you care to believe in, understand that your choice in wife will utterly define your life in ways you cannot comprehend as yet. I’m not against thinking with the little head either. In fact I think that’s pretty important, I’m just in favor of having the little head and the big head agree that it’s a good idea to join to her.
Though do try and figure out whether or not the little head is just bullshiting the big head into making a quick decision. If you have a bad feeling about it just lurking inside you… step away from her for a couple days, away from her pheromones, away from the genetic information you get from her lingering kiss, away from the draw of her cleavage and the curve of her ass. Then think about it just a little more. If she’s the one, she’ll still be the one three days from now.
Also do not offer marriage within three days of having your face anywhere near her vagina. The smell of pussy is designed to control your mind and make you her minion. It’s beyond me why wives ever nag their husbands to do anything, when they could just sit on his face and ask nicely.

Christchurch Earthquake

I’ve had a number of people ask me if my family in New Zealand are okay after the earthquakes in Christchurch. The good news for me, is that my faily lives several hundred miles away, north of Auckland and in Rotorua, so everyone is well clear of it.
Even so, 75 dead and 238 people still unaccounted for and the city of 350,000 people is trashed.
Feel like I’m in the wrong country today.

Be Playfully Mean To Girls Because They Like It

I remember a common occurance in my younger years – seeing an endless variant on boys being playfully mean to girls and having the girls squealing in outrage. Buckets of water tossed on them. Icky spiders tossed on them. Mud flicked at them. On and on and on. It was always something thrown at them that they didn’t want.
I was always appalled because that’s not a very nice way to act. On rare occasion I might say something about it and tell the boys off and tell them to stop being mean, or offer the girls my towel to dry off or whatever. I also struggled to date. No correct that. I couldn’t buy a date with a suitcase of money, my parents’ booze and a limo. Even worse was that frequently…no correct that…even worse was that all the time, the sunbathing girl that got a bucket of water tossed on her started going out with the guy that threw the water.
You treat girls well and they ignore you. You treat girls bad and they want you. That makes no sense. Is the world broken?
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Cynical Advice on Responsible Non-Monogamy

I’ve been asked about “responsible non-monogamy” a couple times over the last few months. I don’t advise stepping into this realm, but should you decide to venture there, let me give you this somewhat cynical advice…
Whether it be cuckolding, swinging or polyamory, the common theme is that the culture they establish is a matriarchal one. The purpose is to create a sub-culture where normal sexual mores are removed and replaced with a shame-free environment, where the normal covert desire for opportunitisic extra-pair-copulations, is allowed to become an overt one.
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A Short Message from the Rationalization Hamster

We have been married for 10 years. Our sexual life has slowed down and became less exciting. So…. when my wife started showing an interest in a co-worker, who is married, we started fantasising about her having sex with him… It turned us on and reignited our sex life. Slowly, to keep the fantasy going, I started encouraging her to flirt more and more with him. Well… Two months ago she started having sex with him and she has developed a strong emotional bond with him. I never thought she would actually do it! It started out as a fantasy that we both enjoyed, now she is actively involved in an intense affair.
It has been two months now and there are no signs that it is going to slow down. I feel like I caused this because I started out with the fantasy… I don’t feel right about telling her to stop… On the other hand, so far our sex life has been completely renewed, she has a sexual energy that I have not seen since we first met.
Any advice? Make her stop, or…
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