I have a question for you about game for women. Is it a beta trait or an alpha trait for a female to show deep attachment or sexual attraction to her mate? I would think that the sexual attraction, at least, is alpha, because it should elicit a sexual response from the male. However, I wonder if there’s any benefit to keep him on his toes a little bit and not get too sure of you, to the point where he gets complacent.
The female deep attachment feeling is related to the oxytocin hormone, so that’s Beta.
The sexual attraction you feel for him is related to both his Alpha sparking a dopamine response in you, and your overall sexual impulse, which is part of your Alpha.
There is an element of conflict in those two impulses.
I think you balance it by framing it as, “I am going to get sex no matter what, but my attachment to you is affecting my all purpose sexual impulse and I am controlling myself to just have sex with you. I’m happy to do that because I do love you and want you, but it’s far easier for me to stay in control if you are giving me the sex I want from you.”
That is in essence my feeling and agreement with Jennifer. I think it’s fairly clear to everyone that I am very high on the scale in terms of overall sexual impulse. To be honest I’d really like to have sex with multiple women I know, I’m not even crushing on anyone, it’s just a general all purpose sexual interest. But I hold it together to have sex with only Jennifer because I love her and understand that me cheating would dramatically change things with us.
But I can’t do that holding it together thing without her having regular sex with me. If she stopped having regular sex with me for no good reason, I don’t know how long I could hold it together and stay faithful to her. We’ve had a few times where we’ve had to hold off on sex for a while – a very rough pregnancy, post-partum, and her awful biopsy experience – all those were fine as I can sympathize she’s in pain and needs my support. But her just not wanting sex with me for no good reason… yeah… very hard to handle.
So there’s an interplay of Alpha and Beta in there. For a husband it’s a brilliant Game approach and something I honestly stumbled onto by both luck and my sheer need to have her repeatedly.