Jennifer and the Two Hundred Pound Raccoon

Jennifer and I usually go grocery shopping together. I used to do it all myself back in my SAHD + working all weekend days, then somehow she took it over for a long time. Now that the kids are old enough to be home alone, we sneak out together on shopping dates.
So anyway, yesterday…
Eggs were on sale. English muffins were on sale. Cheese was crazy on sale. Bacon was crazy on sale plus we had a coupon. See where I’m going with this?
This morning I’m up and awake at about 630am. No reason, just up, so I clear the email, plow the feed reader and do about two hours of reading and commenting on Talk About Marriage.
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  1. Hey Athol, do you know any way to send your book to someone without them knowing who sent it?

  2. Athol Kay says:

    Can't do anything for the Kindle.

    The PDF version would be easy. Just email me a copy of the Lulu reciept and an email address to send it to and I can forward it to them.

    The print version gets tricky with money changing hands and making me go to the post office.

  3. Athol Kay says:

    And no go on the print version work around. Jennifer not keen on our street address getting in the mix.

    So PDF the only option for my direct assistance.

  4. "The print version gets tricky with money changing hands and making me go to the post office."

    Bollocks – haven't you ever done that for porn?

  5. Aw man. I was hoping to read an awesome tale of how you fended off a 200 pound beast with quick thinking and lightning fast reflexes. But this made me laugh so it's all good :)

  6. Athol Kay says:

    Badger – You really think I need to hide porn from Jennifer?

  7. The Mrs. says:

    …So how do I get my husband to return the favor? I make him delicious goodies all the time. Just ask our bathroom scale.

  8. "Badger – You really think I need to hide porn from Jennifer?"

    Well, maybe you don't want the postman knowing about it. He might get the idea some sex-crazed animal lives in the house.

    I'm wondering if this whole blog and book enterprise isn't a big mega-chickporn enterprise you are running on Jennifer. I mean, posts about turning beta guys into alphas who sex up their suddenly-insatiable wives?

  9. Anonymous says:

    So, I think this suggestion about breakfast must be about tone.

    Because, I like to cook breakfast (or anything) for my family, but the way my husband "asks" really pisses me off and entrenches me into NOT doing it. I know I'm stubborn. But I do not like to be yelled at, or spoken to angrily (or entitled), or whined at. It's not that tough, I think.

    And this week, i got groused at when i volunteered to do things that i know he didn't want to do, and i did want to do. which also wasn't fun.

    i don't know what he's being pissy about.

  10. Damn, PDF won't work because I don't have an Email addy for him and if I asked that would be like a flashing beacon! I am going to have to get more creative with this.

  11. Athol Kay says:

    Tone is everything Anon. Everything. Plus I do enough of everything else that I can playfully push for this sort of thing too.

    When I asked her to cook breakfast, I'd already been up and working for three hours.

    Badger – Well of course the whole thing is mega-chickporn thing I'm running on Jennifer. LOL I'm not hiding that at all. I've got over 1000 women a day paying attention to me and my ideas on sex. That's extreme preselection right there.

    Still waiting on my first reader naked photos though. So room for improvement still.

  12. Your post made me realize that although I may want my husband to read your book it could very well lead to him asking me to do some stuff I don't like – like cook. My domestic skills suck. I hate to cook. It's foreign to me and I dread it as much as cleaning toilets (and we pay someone else to clean our toilets). I do have nurturing qualities – I'm supportive and affectionate. I just lack in the domestic skills department. Do I have to work on this area in order to have a more sexually satisfying relationship with my husband? I'm not thrilled about the prospect but I'd do it if it actually helped/worked.

    Does the fact that I make a good deal more $ than my husband factor into the equation at all? Does any of your relationship philosophy change when the woman makes more $ than the man? I ask because when I got married my Uncle told me he thought it would be a point of contention in my marriage but it never has been. At least not that I'm aware of…

  13. Athol Kay says:

    Candace – making money is a Beta Trait, cooking is a Beta Trait. As long as he gets to eat, it's probably all good on a day to day basis.

    However… learn how to make 1-2 meals/dishes that he really loves, and you will gain some ground I think.

    Cooking is just a life skill.

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