Vasectomy Question

Reader email…
“You put some emphasis on ejaculating into the womb so that nutrients contained in seminal fluid can be absorbed by your female partner.

We all know that the primary purpose of the vasectomy is to eliminate semen from the ejaculate. But does the vasectomy also eliminate/reduce these other nutrients?

Coitus-interruptus has been our/my preferred choice of BC (and have been really successful over my 31 year LTR – only 2 kids, youngest is now 22) and had been considering getting snipped recently – if only for the benefits to the wife. Was not cognizant that semen absorption could be so critical to a LTR – but I wasn’t aware of a lot of relationship dynamics till I stumbled upon your MMSL blog (By the way – love the Primer!)….

Of course, now that she’s 50 (I’m 52), menopause is ‘just around the corner’. So soon, she’ll be ‘sterile’. So should I hold off on the operation? No, don’t expect you to answer the question (though your opinion is welcome). But I don’t want to ‘screw the pooch’ if the operation does more than eliminate semen from the ejaculate….”
Minor correction of terms first. The ejaculate is about 5% sperm, and 95% semen. So the idea of the vasectomy is to stop the sperm ever getting mixed in with the semen. So after a vasectomy you should ejaculate nothing but the semen with just a minor loss of total ejaculate volume.
What’s in the semen should remain fairly unchanged, though there’s also some testosterone in semen – the purpose being to trigger her sex drive further. Considering the primary production location for testosterone in your body is in your testicles, blocking the most obvious route for testosterone to get into her vagina by the vasectomy, I would assume it quite possibly reduces the testosterone that goes from you to her via the semen.
However, please read these posts…
And…
What you are rolling the dice on is… a handful of years until she hits menopause vs. the remainder of your sexual life. Having gone this far successfully as you have, I would beg you not to have a vasectomy at this point. You’re gambling two or three years vs. hopefully twenty to thirty years.
A vasectomy may very well turn out 100% perfect for you, but I simply see no reason to risk permanent pain or worse, when you could simply use what you have done until now or condoms for a couple more years.  Surgical is always the last option.
As I say in those posts – there is so little science on the aftermath of vasectomy that all I can offer is a hunch that it isn’t safe as they say it is. Many couples do just fine with vasectomy and love it. My worry is that if you don’t love it, well… you’re pretty much having to go back under the knife to fix it.  Even then you may be hosed…  (Wikipedia)

“One study found that epididymectomy provided relief for 50% of patients with post-vasectomy pain syndrome.

Orchiectomy is recommended usually only after other surgeries have failed.”
So… please don’t do it without extreme thought and your own research.
 

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Comments

  1. Anonymous says:

    detinennui32 here:
    The only reason to have a vasectomy is you're married, definitely done having kids, and still relatively young. A 52 year old man married to a comparably aged woman should not have a vasectomy. If she'll soon go through menopause, there's no point. The surgery is painful and not fun to go through but recovery time is quick. It can be reversed but it's expensive, not covered by insurance, and does not always work. I've heard of others with chronic vasectomy pain (feels a little like blueball) but still others I've heard have no problems.

    Orchiectomy for post-vasectomy?? Egads.

  2. CSPB says:

    I have heard that there may be a correlation between early onset dementia and vasectomy. I doubt that there will be much meaningful research on this because it wouldn't be Politically Correct. But there are unintended consequences of many things. Wishing it were not so does not change reality.

    For instance, the birth control pill is not benign and it causes a decrease in arousal in a woman, messes with her pheromone receptors and may have an everlasting effect on both a woman's fertility and her ease of arousal. In addition, women on the pill choose a biologically similar man rather than a biological complimentary man. Then once off the pill, she may experience a physiological aversion to him. Just guess what this means for the sexual relationship?

    Such inconvenient truths are rarely researched or publicized. So rather than putting full faith in a doctor’s advice, I would advise each man to do some independent research on potential negative consequences of having a vasectomy. There is probably more to this than merely rendering him incapable of fertilizing a woman.

  3. paige says:

    CSPB-

    I know a woman who married a man who most women find repulsively feminine while she was on the pill. I am pretty beta-accepting so if even I am a bit grossed out then you know it is bad. She went off the pill to try and have a baby and I just pray it didn't result in a rude awakening.

    I am not entirely sure her husband is straight because the gay vibe was just that strong.

  4. Anon Husband says:

    Athol, I think your views on the effects of semen on women are speculative. There just hasn't been that much work done on the subject (AFAIK), and there are always biases in the science that's done on provocative subjects. For instance, that "man-bites-dog!!" findings of any stripe are what achieves prominence via the media.

    I'm not saying you're wrong — just that the jury is going to be out on this one for a while, yet.

    Re: vasectomy, my own experience: I got snipped after kid #3 — the right number for both of us — at age 46. It has worked out all right. The operation was not particularly painful, no pain afterwords, no change in my sex drive.

    That said, I would not do it again, or advise it for men in similar circumstances.

    In my case, there have been two drawbacks.

    First, the volume of my ejaculate declined by more than half, in the ~2 years following my procedure. This could have been due to aging — I dunno — but the correlation makes me suspect the vasectomy. As a result, the act of climaxing is less intense, physically. (It's still enjoyable, and my sex drive remains moderately high.)

    Second: though it isn't a crucial factor, I think that the vasectomy has been an obstacle to an improved relationship with my wife. In retrospect, I was too nice-guy beta and not enough alpha. Too accepting of feminism and unaware of Game, much less Married Game.

    I guess "Taking one for the Team" could strengthen the marriage, if the guy already is plenty alpha, and his wife appreciates and acknowledges the alpha in his alpha/beta mix.

    But as is pointed out over and over at MMSL, when a Nice Guy acts Even Nicer, he gets contempt more than respect.

    I lowered my own fitness, when I should have been helping my wife think about how to raise hers.

    My wife's selling point was that her concern about an unwanted pregnancy prevented her from enjoying sex with me. This was undoubtedly true. But removal of that concern did not translate into better or more frequent intimate encounters. Instead, there were new explanations to accompany the old issue.

    If I were to do it over, I'd have us look at the minimally-invasive alternatives to tubal ligation, Essure and Adiana. Failing those, I'd stick with non-permanent birth control until menopause.

    Just one husband's experience. YMMV. Certainly not a big enough sample size for me to offer broad conclusions on the subject.

  5. Eric says:

    My wife and I were finished having kids by the time we hit 30, and I had a vasectamy so she could go off the pill. Was the best thing I ever did for our sex life. I don't know if it was the hormonal change of her going off the pill or no longer being concerned about unplanned pregnancy (our first child was conceived while taking the pill), but she became much hornier and more daring in bed after the procedure, which was 5 years ago, and it hasn't let up yet.

    And to be quite honest, not worrying about unplanned pregnancy makes the sex better for me as well.

  6. Eric says:

    Also, in reference to the above post, I've never measured the output but I can say there was no noticeable decrease in ejaculate, and my climax is the same in terms of physical sensation (and better mentally). Was tender for 3 or 4 days after the procedure, but no ongoing pain beyond that. The only real shocker that I was unprepared for was the first ejaculation after procedure (a trial run in the shower), which was, um, rust colored. All systems were go after that.

  7. Anonymous says:

    Vasectomy after 3 kids, in my 30's, wife was using diaphragm for birth control prior. Vasectomy was best thing for sex life.
    No complications from surgery, was pretty relaxed.
    Surgeon told me stories of over weight men and having a hard time locating their junk,some Doctors sending vasdeferen to pathology and it being vein.

    Friend has 10 kids, 4 with first wife, has V,gets divorced. New wife wants kids, has it reversed has 5 kids w/second wife. Gets a V but does not have it checked, wife gets pregnant again. Has 1 more V.

  8. LJ says:

    My husband is booked in for a vasectomy next month. We're in our early thirties and have the two kids we've always wanted. I've commented before about the effect the combined pill had on my sex drive and neither of us wants to return to those days. We've been using condoms since the birth of our youngest and I cannot wait to be rid of them – my husband rarely finishes inside me while wearing them, I vastly prefer the 'natural' feel of bare skin and there's always the niggling worry about split condoms. On saying all that, the vasectomy was entirely his idea – I'd never push him into something so serious but he was more than happy to go that route than me trying an alternative female birth control.

  9. Anonymous says:

    "have heard that there may be a correlation between early onset dementia and vasectomy."

    That also comes from to much beer, can't imagine to much beer and a vasectomy. OMG

  10. Athol Kay says:

    "I have heard that there may be a correlation between early onset dementia and vasectomy."

    There are some potential links to that yes.

    http://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/2007-02/nu-vmp021207.php

  11. CSPB says:

    I should have done an internet search and posted the link. I have no plans to get ever get a vasectomy so I did not need to look it up for my own benefit. Yet it was easy to find with a Google search of "dementia" and "vasectomy." I see the original study/speculation on this was 2007 and no later studies came up so it remains speculative. I can't help but wonder if further research is not forthcoming because of the unpopularity of any results. This would not be a PC subject likely to receive funding.

    I'd also like to point out that unintended consequences are unknown and unimagined. Common sense sometimes does not even reveal an apparent linkage. It is typical that many people disregard something that may affect them without doing any investigation. That is unfortunate, but it is their life. I point this out to encourage people to challenge beliefs they hold and to research and think independently.

    Athol’s book was developed by his willingness to challenge and investigate commonly held beliefs that turn out to be incorrect. Much of Game is initially counter-intuitive and the things a man can do to facilitate a good marriage and good sex life are exactly opposite of the things society encourages us to believe. Although I have not yet read Athol’s book, I would wager a large amount of money on the fact that most of what Athol has put in his book is exactly opposite of what professional marriage counselors advocate. This is a good thing because the success rate with marriage counseling is not great.

    I have been through marriage counseling with my ex-wife and all of it was contrary to what I have learned in the study of Game. In fact I would say that marriage counseling made my failed marriage worse. This is because it mostly encourages a man to become even more beta, when the problem was that he was too beta to begin with.

  12. Candice says:

    If the vasectomy blocks sperm exit, then does this contribute to congestion in the testicles, i.e. blue balls? Not all men suffer blue balls, so this could perhaps explain why not all have pain after a vasectomy.

    I used various physical signs to predict my fertility – there are only about 8 days of a cycle that are remotely fertile. It is therefore totally possible to control one's family size with a graph and some condoms without heroic efforts and damage to anybody's genitals. You can also enjoy au naturel for most of the time!

  13. Anonymous says:

    @Candice: Detinennui32 here. The male body just absorbs the sperm. You don't get sperm backed up. I used to suffer terrible cases of blueballs before my snip, but only because of sexual frustration due to beta behavior. Don't have blueballs now at all.

  14. Athol Kay says:

    The male body doesn't "just absorb the sperm". Most men have a constant immune system response to the sperm to deal with them.

    I'm still researching this as I can. Half the studies say it's bad, half of them say it's no a problem.

  15. Candice says:

    Thanks for your comments – I really appreciate finding this forum where I can ask men questions about men's issues. Naturally I am limited to the number of men I can question in real life. I've already picked up some good stuff from other articles as well! I'm working on applying the being "too nice" concept to my relationships with men as well. I think the concepts transfer…. :-) C

  16. Athol Kay says:

    Candice – 80% or more of what I say applies directly to women as well as men.

  17. CSPB says:

    I just came across this YouTube video and it touches on many things including Vasectomy.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SC4horRfoVg

  18. e.p. says:

    At 50; definitely wait for your wife to hit menopause. You really don't have a lot to gain.

    I got a vasectomy at 24, after 2 kids. No regrets. No loss of sensation. It didn't change our sex life (for better or worse) but it gave me the freedom to not have to worry about condoms (or if she missed the pill). If anything it is kind of liberating.

  19. Samuel says:

    my vasectomy was brilliant and turned me into a sex god. I'm looking forward to my dementia as well.

    I know that there are risks with the big V but the majority of cases are fully successful. No drop in sex drive, no drop in ejaculate, etc. No worries or fear of pregnancy… all good, man. I'm surprised to see so many ppl down on the procedure.

  20. jackal says:

    Semen has direct effect on female brain
    by Kate Taylor
    Posted August 21, 2012 – 04:00
    http://www.tgdaily.com/general-sciences-features/65569-semen-has-direct-effect-on-female-brain

    Aside from sperm and testosterone, the testis also synthesize NGF, a powerful protein that triggers fertility and sexual interest in females. A vasectomy disrupts the NGF pathway via the vas deferens to the female brain. Knowing this, there’s little wonder why a female would lose interest in her vasectomized partner. A vasectomy, hard as it will be to admit, is one, huge hormonal disruptor. Where pleasure is ephemeral reward for the sex act, NGF is the mechanism that bonds couples for the long haul. Unless you want to dump your wife, you’d best be inseminating her with NGF — the more often, the better the bond. And that’s not all. Semen has many other constituents with functions yet unknown. Better to consider a little common sense when messing with the body. If it’s not broke, don’t fix it.

    It’s surprising that NGF, alongside vasectomy, isn’t at the top of search engine results. No wonder men are still undergoing vasectomy, obviously by urologists in huge denial here.

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