The Ten Second Kiss vs Protection Shields

I bought your book. Read it in a couple hours. Great stuff. Really nice way of putting together all the “Game” I’ve been learning from Mystery and Roissy over the past year.

I tried out the 10 second kiss on my ex. She was a poli-sci major, self-proclaimed feminist, president of the student body two years in a row, etc. The first two times, she took me straight into the bedroom. After that, it was like she consciously KNEW what I was up to; she refused. She turned her head away, physically pushed me away, and otherwise prevented me from doing it. Was this a fitness test, and how should I have handled it?

And I’ve since noticed that there are some women who Game works on at first, but then it is like they realize what is happening and inoculate themselves against it, just preventing any opportunity for the maneuvers to happen.
Hi there,
If the 10 second kiss feels staged and you act like it could/should lead immediately to sex, it’s going to feel like manipulation. Try it in a situation where you can’t immediately have sex… like when you’re leaving for work in the morning, or she’s leaving to go somewhere. It’s meant to be a push-pull thing. Ideally you just frame yourself as “a really good kisser” and toss a ten second kiss at her at semi-random.
In this case no, I don’t think it’s a Fitness Test. I suspect your ex just figured out she let herself get suckered in with the ten second kisses twice already, and seeing she’s your ex, she doesn’t want to get pulled back into a relationship with you. Her weak point is the kissing, so she cockblocks you there. I’d take it as a sign that the ten second kisses are extremely effective lol.
Yes women can get wise to game. Especially the pure club/bar thing with routines like The Mystery Method espouses. They can work fantastically on a new girl, but after she’s seen them a couple times she’ll figure out the magic trick and it’s just not that special anymore. Displays of High Value without having Actual High Value only last so long. Actual High Value… like a shit-ton of cash, six-pack abs, social prominence, big house… well they just do their thing in the background and aren’t in your face “LOL I AM PUA”, but they pull just the same.
By all means run routines on a girl, I run stuff on Jennifer all the time… but I don’t do it consciously as a routine planned routine. I lean far further toward Austin Powers than Mystery. It’s not so much a cocky and funny thing I do as a horny and goofy thing. That way if anything totally bombs, I can just play it off as intentionally awkward and throw out a “What’s for dinner?” or “My penis wants to say hi” or something touching like that.
Oh I wandered…
She had her shields up. Don’t push against them as that makes them stronger. The more you try and claw your way in, the harder the shields get to keep you out. Her shields are up because she isn’t feeling comfortable… these are not Bitch Shields, these are Protection Shields. Stop pushing, change the subject, break it up with humor.
Or more simply, reduce your attention to her and walk away and do something else. You’d be surprised at how often they will seek you out after you reduce the pressure.
 

Comments

  1. Anonymous says:

    Yes women can get wise to game. Especially the pure club/bar thing with routines like The Mystery Method espouses. They can work fantastically on a new girl, but after she's seen them a couple times she'll figure out the magic trick and it's just not that special anymore.

    Here's a question I have about so called "saturation theory". Have we reached the point where all girls 18-35 know what Game is? And know about Mystery's method and Negs, etc.. How effective is it all anymore? I relatively new to the scene and I want to use it but I would like to know what to expect out there. Will one girl in three call me out on using PUA stuff? What are some experiences of guys in the field?

    D.B.

  2. Anonymous says:

    It's amazing how learning these truths about women can be painful and exciting at the same time. Painful from the standpoint of looking at ALL of the time, money, effort, etc. that I've wasted, but exciting when I look at the success with quality women that I have before me. Sobering to say the least . .. .

  3. Rebekah says:

    D.B.

    I am 35 and I can tell you that I can spot a PUA pretty early on, and I shut it down. Game has pretty much saturated the web community, so girls aren't as blind to it anymore. Sure you are going to be able to go out there and find some "girl" it works quite well on. Also, I don't know too many women over 30 that negging actually works on. Good Luck.

  4. I am very wary of too nice or too cocky. Too cocky suggests your a narcissistic while too nice suggests you are trying to sell me something I probably don't want.

    I think cocky-funny works better on the party girls since they tend to be more attracted to flashiness. I, however, am easily bored by people who don't have something genuinely interesting to say. I like to see some indication that the guy has some depth and personality and isn't just totally ego-driven.

    So I guess the Mystery Method type game strategies work depending on what kind of girl you are trying to pick-up.

  5. Anonymous says:

    it sound like the letter writers mistake was letting her take him to the bedroom the first two times. If he had kissed her and left, then he would have not given away his motive(unless his motive was sex twice). Always leave them wanting more.

  6. Anon 1:28 you have it spot on. There's nothing worse than only getting some tender affection when your man wants some action. You find yourself thinking 'oh, he's kissing me, he wants sex, do I want sex too, hmmm better decide quick before he thinks it's a cert' instead of enjoying it. Much better to give this kind of erotic, tender attention with no obvious expectation. Women love kissing, so if you do it right she'll be thinking about it, and you, for quite some time afterwards and personally this kind of affection makes me feel loved, rather than just desired at specific times. It means you can enjoy the kiss and see where it leads with no pressure.

  7. Athol Kay says:

    Don't forget that the 10 second kiss is meant to be just that.

  8. Thag Jones says:

    Have we reached the point where all girls 18-35 know what Game is? And know about Mystery's method and Negs, etc.. How effective is it all anymore?

    This is always a risk when you use the devil's toolbox instead of cultivating actual honesty and mastery.

  9. Paige:

    Are you sure that your boredom with his conversation has nothing to do with him not tickling your fancy from the start?

  10. Athol Kay says:

    Also most guys confuse a proper neg with simply being rude. It's really more of a light teasing than anything else… a gentle ruffle.

  11. Anonymous says:

    First, thanks for all the responses. My questions:

    This is always a risk when you use the devil's toolbox instead of cultivating actual honesty and mastery.

    Mastery of what?

    I am 35 and I can tell you that I can spot a PUA pretty early on…

    How do you know? Also, there is a difference between game and pua in this sense. Game is basically the evolutionary psychology approach to sexual psychology. Its personality dominance at its root. You can be a dominant alpha without using the Mystery Method. So I'm wondering if you can spot game in general or just PUAs.

    and I shut it down.

    How do you do this?

    Also, I don't know too many women over 30 that negging actually works on.

    Roissey says differently. He says that 35 year old women because they are about to hit the wall are very easy to game. My guess is he would say that your hamster is talking. But Roissey could be overstating the case.

    I, however, am easily bored by people who don't have something genuinely interesting to say. I like to see some indication that the guy has some depth and personality and isn't just totally ego-driven.

    Yeah but this is exactly what game is designed to do: to provide ready made interesting conversation material. This is what Ross Jefferies discovered in the 90s. So if a guy is using game right you shouldn't be bored. He should be saying interesting things with teasing and some cocky/playful thrown in.

    Your comment actually makes me think that game still works.

    D.B.

  12. Thag Jones says:

    Mastery of self.

    A "neg" seems to me to be simply that form of flirting that is the verbal equivalent to the old middle school thing of hitting someone on the butt with a shovel to show that you like them. It's not a new invention and it's a good ice breaker. I use it myself but I guess it's "ball breaking" when a woman does it and the same thing applies where obviously you have to gauge how far you can go with a particular person before you just end up being offensive. That takes a little social skill that you can't really teach – trial and error I guess.

  13. "She was a poli-sci major, self-proclaimed feminist, president of the student body two years in a row, etc."

    There´s your main problem right there!
    Why bother with such an indoctrinated status seeking attention hog?

    A PUA would accuse you of "Oneitis", obviously the wrong place here for THAT one. ;)

    I would just ask you why you need to punish yourself chasing after someone who plain and simple doesn´t want you.
    And is probably even hating you for simply acting like a man (as her ideology brainwashed her to).

  14. "Have we reached the point where all girls 18-35 know what Game is? And know about Mystery's method and Negs, etc.. How effective is it all anymore?"

    I would say _very_ few women OR men have any real awareness of the evo-psych attraction tactics (isn't it quaint to think about the now-defunct concept of the "seduction community"?)

    Game types estimate that maybe 1% of men are actually implementing any kind of real game – too many other guys are wedded to their pretty lies. As a result women won't have seen it enough to get familiar with it.

    "I relatively new to the scene and I want to use it but I would like to know what to expect out there."

    I'll tell you what to expect – more success with women. This stuff really does work, if you can integrate it into your personality and not come off as a robot. The #1 thing you can do for success is to be non-outcome-focused – you are being you, and if others want to be part of that then more power to them, otherwise you're just fine.

    "Will one girl in three call me out on using PUA stuff? What are some experiences of guys in the field?"

    I'm not sure I've ever heard a case of a woman specifically accusing a guy of using Roissy/MysteryMethod/some particular PUA shtick.

    Important game lesson: a girl could call you out on anything you say or do, "game" or not. Instead of being concerned about it and memorizing comebacks and responses, simply view it as a fitness test – either frame against it, or just ignore it. Yes, you can ignore a woman busting your chops and just go on with the conversation.

  15. Anonymous says:

    Badger,

    Thank you for your response. It was helpful.

    Can you recommend a good PUA forum or two that has good posters that deal with all things related to what's actually happening in the field in 2011.

    Thanks again.

    D.B.

  16. D.B.,

    I can't, I don't frequent PUA forums per se. I would visit:

    1. My blog, where I riff on game from time to time such as last Friday's field report.

    2. The blogs linked from my blog, most notably Private Man, Collegeslacker, hooking up smart, workshy joe, Freedom Twenty Five and Solomon II.

    3. Read a bushel of posts at Roissy, preferably ones before early 2010 when the tenor of the blog changed significantly.

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