Sexy Move: Be Fully Present

When you kiss, think about nothing but the kiss.


  1. Anonymous says:

    I was curious when this Episode of Star Trek: TNG would come up. :)

    Actually, it would be awesome to see you do a full deconstruction on it, as I'm sure many younger nerds feel like this is about the way relationships go.

  2. Anonymous says:

    I know I'm a weirdo but I totally was drooling over this.
    I would totally do him right there. "Tell me how exactly you reconfigure the fields officer…say it out loud?"
    Had I mentioned that I find science really hot?
    Oh God I'm giggling like a school girl right now.
    Happy place, happy place :)

    Stephenie Rowling.

  3. Looking Glass says:

    First post Anon as well.

    Stephenie: You make many geek hearts hope there are more of you, lol.

    One thing about that episode, Data actually ends up being pure Alpha at the end, because he can just move on, while she thought she wanted it but doesn't. Interesting how accurate a lot of that turns out to be.

  4. Miles Anderson says:

    Spiner rocks!

  5. Athol Kay says:

    Data ends up with the cat so that's not really a win lol.

    He is pure Alpha in the sense that he has essentially zero Beta though. He does not emotionally connect to her at all. He's basically just a really good vibrator…

    …which was what Tasha Yar liked about him.

  6. Anonymous says:

    Disagree with your analysis Athol.
    They didn't worked out because she was looking to connect with him at HER level, she couldn't possibly connect at HIS level given how complex he was. Is the same problem Dr. Manhattan had with Silk Specter 2, Jon saw the world in a different way but he still cared, he just can't care on a way that she understood and that killed the affection she had for her.
    Data tried to researched how things work between normal people to make her happy, would he had done that if he wasn't because he cared about her, in his own positronic way?
    If he had read your book, I'm pretty sure he would had tell her something different ;)

    Which is in essence the whole problem with gender wars. A woman tries to connect with a man in the same way she connect through everything and the man does the same and then things can get ugly really fast. Both gender had to understand the limits of each to reach a middle ground, to gain a loving sexy relationship.

    That being said you are right in not advice guys to act like Data. In the real world is hard to find a woman willing to try and remember this so is more pragmatic to learn how to connect with her that sitting waiting for one of these to appear is as elusive as women wanting the bad boy womanizer commit to them, YMMV.

    Stephenie Rowling.

  7. Athol Kay says:

    LOL how can you disagree with my analysis when I've defined the terms we're using? :-)

    He could attract her (alpha) but never emotionally connect to her and create comfort (beta).

    Data didn't care for her any more than he cared for his cat. It's just a software routine, not actual feelings. The cat doesn't mind though because it's just a cat and getting fed.

    Once he had is emotion chip, that would have been a very different situation.

  8. Anonymous says:

    The software routine are his feelings. He is an android you might say that his sense of loyalty and intelligence are just softwares too, it doesn't make him any less part of the crew. He also has strong "software routines" towards Geordi (his best friend) and the crew, specially his captain and he kept an image of Tasha Yar after she died, also he cared very much about his daughter Lal, that software surely knows about things like caring and missing.
    In many ways we also have our feelings programed by biology and biochemistry, dopamine, testosterone…are the biological equivalent of softwares, IMO.
    In Data he might just miss the attraction one, but the bonding ones are there working and functioning, very well.

    That being said I always wondered why they never explored the emotion chip on a romantic context in the universe. Data falling in love should be an interesting concept to explore.

    Stephenie Rowling.

  9. "Data ends up with the cat"

    Spinster lit??

    Shameless plug to my post on mindfulness:

  10. Looking Glass says:

    Data ended up with the cat (Spot) because they needed a standard plot device for him. The cat goes through several species & gender changes after this point.

    There's also a solid angle from this episode that Data is all Alpha and while trying to add Beta in, he can only draw from sources that don't actually work. Which means Athol didn't exist in Star Trek's timeline! The universe for worse for fate. :(

  11. Athol Kay says:

    Looking Glass – "Which means Athol didn't exist in Star Trek's timeline!"

    Lucky for me that old man gave me that book about marriage…

  12. Anonymous says:

    Looking Glass- LOL Too true. Spot was a changeling Cat or something.

    Maybe the girl needed to give Data more time to research. I have a hard time to believe that this happy universe could exist without Athol's book being there somewhere. ;)

    Stephenie Rowling

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