Why Men Are So Paranoid About Girls Night Out

Back in the day when I dating my first serious girlfriend Mary, she and a couple of her girlfriends decided to go to a club. Being a squeaky clean Christian, I’d never been to a proper club, but I knew what it was about. So I ran interference and essentially demanded that I get to go along too. (In retrospect, I think the whole thing was just another Fitness Test!)  I straight up told her it was a meat market and if she was going, I needed to come too. I think it was one of the few tests I actually passed with flying colors.
About halfway through the night she semi-apologized and agreed that the whole place was a meat market. Overall we had a good time though and I got to end the night with a pretty fantastic makeout session. She actually complained that she was turned on so much that she was struggling with wanting to have sex but she didn’t wear down my last minute resistance…
…oh snap. I could have…
Buy Me!


  1. modernguy says:

    Also, if she's doing that she doesn't deserve to be a wife or gf. Just bang her for as long as she sticks around.

  2. Athol Kay says:

    Meh once or maybe twice tops is just a Fitness Test.

  3. modernguy says:

    Threatening to slut it up isn't a fitness test, it's a threat. So you have to decide how you want to deal with threats.

  4. Anonymous says:

    Also depends what the "GNO" entails. Difference between a Wine Tasting & dive bar in a seedy area dressed about like a hooker.

  5. Cuckolding of men is the equivalent of rape for women. It's that level of primal fear. The men who didn't guard their mates didn't reproduce and got washed out of the gene pool. What am I going to do, rely on her drunk girlfriends to keep her from taking another man's seed? As if.

  6. Jason P. says:

    I gotta admit, this is something I struggle with. However, most of the time she goes on a GNO to a bar, it's to see a band. And she is texting me most of the night. When the band isn't there, I go along. So I am okay with this. Plus it's a once every couple of months thing. If it were more frequent, I'd have an issue.

  7. Trimegistus says:

    I'm still uncertain what kind of husband puts up with the idea of his wife going out drinking at some meat market. The answer to that is simple: "No." Repeat as necessary.

    Maybe this is more common in other parts of the country, or different social circles than mine, but it just sounds like a bad idea on every level.

    If she wants to socialize with her friends, they can go to Sunday brunch and get tipsy on mimosas.

  8. Phil Mueller says:

    Where I first met my wife: at church
    Her interest level in going out to clubs: nil
    Amount of cockblocking I have to do: minimal

    Mate selection ftw

  9. @Jason, that is usually the case with my wife's GNO's too,: if they involve going to a bar, it is to see live music. If it's a band I like, I am always invited (with the option to invite some of my friends and the understanding that she's going to be hanging with her girls). Likewise, sometimes I will go out to see a band or a performer with some guy friends, a few times I've gone alone. Our love of music is one of the things that brought us together, and live music is our default "date" when we get a night away from the kids together, so when one of us says they want to go see some live music with friends, it would feel cruel and uneccesary to say no, unless there was some deeper issue at play.

    The texts are a nice bonus, too. In addition to commentary on the bands and fun back and forth about what we're going to do to eachother when she gets home, since becoming aware of PUA culture, my wife is also on the lookout for guys who are plainly running game and I have gotten texts that read something like: "Does it count as a 'neg' if I made him call me a bitch within 10 seconds of dropping his poorly canned opener on me?"

  10. Anonymous says:

    BS on the 'texting' as a sign of safety.
    I had a girl who got off on phoning her boyfriend for casual conversation while she rode me.

  11. Not a sign of safety, but a bonus behavior. There are no real signs of safety, only degrees of trust which may or may not be well placed. Life is risk.

    With that said, the type of girl who is going to text one dude while riding some other dude can't be trusted for shit no matter what she does. Doesn't matter if you send her to the bar or not, that girl is gong to ruin your life if you marry her.

  12. Midlife Restart says:

    Wow. I find it hard to believe her boyfriend had no other indications that his girl had NO moral values and was a hardcore slut. Unless she is a pro at the con game, how could she possibly hide that kind of attitude? I mean, its one thing to be a loose skank and cheat on a guy, its another to mock him by calling him while riding another man.

  13. And here I thought my husband was the baby sniper…took us 3 months for each of our kids. Way to rock the manliness Athol.

    While we're on the topic…any posts on your blog about why his semen burns me? It's the same old stuff I've had for years, and I know I don't have an infection since I just had a PAP and pelvic exam.

  14. Athol Kay says:

    Katy – you may be allergic to his semen. Head to the doctors. He eating anything new? Is he using a different soap that you are reacting to?

  15. Yeah, texting and phoning mean nothing. Too many tales and "video evidence" (heh) of SO talking to UnSO during "the rodeo".

    As for the burning semen lady, is your hubby a gulf vet? They gave them VERY weird stuff in those inoculations. Good luck on that. :(

    Otherwise change your diets. We generally eat too acidic foodstuffs(ie grain/dairy based).
    Learn about the paleo diet. Should do the trick.

  16. modernguy says:

    It's wrong to think that this kind of thing is a shit-test in itself. There's really nothing for a man to do besides forbid it outright, which could very well be an overreaction. If you let her go, with the reasonable assumption that she's not going to blow someone in the bathroom or go home with him, it become a test for her. If she does cheat then it becomes a shit test for you, to which the only appropriate response is to dump her.

  17. Anonymous says:

    Texting does not=safety….are people that stupid?

  18. Anonymous says:

    As a woman, in my experience the whole GNO thing is problematic. The "girls" may rationalize that it is just innocent social time with friends, but there is always the opportunity for misbehavin' which is part of the fun…a little risky business may break out for someone!

    Men who believe this is harmless are fooling themselves, don't care how much you trust your woman.

  19. Jim Hollywood says:

    @ Anon — And the problem with risky business is that to get the same kick over time you have to up the ante. For some things in life that is a good thing. Biut not this. It is playing "just the tip". To me the betrayal is in the willingness to take the risk in the first place. I do get the allure that women have for it. Dangerous stuff.

  20. Anonymous says:

    After spending all my life in the nightclub business, both in management and in ownership… I will flat out tell you that the reason I will forever remain single… is…. well… because I spent all of my life in the nightclub business. You can only follow them, join them, cock block for so long… but eventually, there will come a time when "Eve" demands that she be entitled to her "grrrrrrls night out" out without out you, lest you be branded a control freak who will not let her have any 'fun' with the members of the "Ya ya's"…(all of whom, I might add, are all divorced and looking for cock, and expecting your innocent princess to join them. You will be held as the enemy, preventing her from having her fun, while at the same time, trying to convince you that she is the "different" one from all of her 'grrrrrlfriends' who all actually starred in the latest "what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas" commercial.

    The years of watching married women during convention season, away from their mates…. the years of "happy hour" hand holdings under the table with a fellow co worker… and the DIVORCE PARTIES that I have personally hosted (all held by women…..men never have divorce parties at bars… they're usually the ones blowing their heads off somewhere after they learned about the happy hour romance to begin with) have led me to the conclusion that absolutely NO woman who claims to be in a relationship or married is to ever……..and I mean EVER be trusted without her man for "grrrrrrls night out".

    You can argue NAWALT with me all day long…. but trust me… I've seen enough through my years to know that not ONE of them can be trusted.

    You would be surprised as to how many of your wives tried to pick ME up once learning I was the owner….

  21. Athol Kay says:

    Great comment Anon 2:14

  22. 2:14 – harrowing stuff.

    If a woman isn't for sale, she shouldn't advertise. Or go into the store.

  23. 2:14 agreed

  24. "Cuckolding of men is the equivalent of rape for women."

    I don't think any man in history has ever fantasized about being cuckolded

    so no, it's not equivalent, it's worse

  25. Athol Kay says:

    Jso – there's a crap ton of cuckold porn out there. It's a big market. :-/

  26. Brett Stevens says:

    People like to pretend that going to meat market clubs is "normal."

    No one you want to date or marry does that.

    GNO is an honored tradition that involves getting mildly sloppy drunk with your female friends.

    Anything more than that and it's cover for her testing the waters of infidelity.

    My advice to all men hitched to such a woman: get a pre-nup that demands a paternity test.

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