Betaized nice guy husband, no major negative incident by either husband or wife, but she’s fallen out of love with him and realizes her discontent. She gives him a fair warning and tells him to buy the book and he does so. The question being, “How long does it take for him to change?”
he’s probably got this huge mental shift that needs to happen. I simply don’t think the average woman understands how brainwashed “good/nice guys” are to be that way. It’s going to take him several months to really start believing it. Likely 1-2 years to really get into it fully. If you want a timeline, it took me about five years to do my self-education to the point I am at now. Your husband gets the benefit of all my knowledge to date wrapped up in a handy dandy book, so for him it should go much faster than I took.
For you… the problem for you now is that up until you discovered MMSL, your discontent was simply a discontent. But now you have language to describe it, which can intensify the sense of unhappiness you have. Plus now when he isn’t being the perfect Alpha, you can be disgusted by that more because you can recognize it. You can end up Fitness Testing him on his knowledge and application of MMSL. Just something to be aware of.
Seeing you just lowered the boom on him, he’s extremely anxious right now. When people get anxious, they tend to intensify their coping pattern. So if he’s low-Alpha and high-Beta as a pattern, he’s likely to head to zero-Alpha and total-Beta in the short term.
So breathe, let him digest, give him some time to try things out. It will be a little forced at first, but in time it can all come together.
(P.S. Your fair warning and not just walking or cheating on him are a true gift. You guys should be fine, write me anytime.)