Reader: (yada yada yada redacted) ….and this gets to my question. I am also being a playful ass with my wife. Nothing harsh or mean just little comments about sex, her, us, what ever pops into my mind. And this is getting to my question, which I think know the answer. Yesterday I sent a text asking for the color of her panties. No response. She texted me later and said “Have fun at the gym, see your sore ass later tonight!”. I responded back “that is not the only thing that is going to be sore”. No response. After the gym she mentioned my comments and said don’t do it. what if someone sees her texts. She also said I should date a stripper. The stripper part was a joke. I told her I was an ass but did not apologize. Last night I am taking a shower she jumps in and then jumps me. Sex in the shower does happen, but normally I say lets go or she mentions before getting in the shower. Last night it was just there in my lap before I knew it. Obviously she knew we were going get busy that night b/c of my text but she took the initiative.
So the question is, should I not play with her via text or should I ignore her requests to stop?
Athol: So she told you not to text her sexy things (talk), but jumped you in the shower (action) after you texted her sexy things?
Actual message – You texting me sexy things makes me horny as hell. So I’d keep it up without being overwhelming about it.
Jennifer: And there is a line here…for me, a few times a day is sexy, a few times an hour while I’m really trying to be productive, I’m driving, or I’m in a meeting is obnoxious. (If he gets the “love you, in a meeting” text back from me, he waits to start the game up again when I give him the all clear.)
Athol: We actually have each other GPS tagged on our phones so if I do see her out on an appointment, I never sext her.
Anyway… Women really like being treated like sex objects by guys they are attracted to. For sure they don’t want it 24/7, but at least for some of their day. Virtually every affair these days involves hundreds if not thousands of text messages between the two parties. A fair bit of those texts are going to be sexually orientated. Women like this, you just have to persist a little and keep asking for a little more. Act like you were her lover.
The trick is try and step up the intensity when she’s ovulating and establish a new baseline of comfort. So month one you can sext some basic teasing, and when she’s ovulating you can bump it up to “What color are your panties?”
After she’s told you panty color once, you’ve broken that barrier and she’s going to do it again, so you can keep asking that. Next time she ovulates, you can ask for a cleavage pic or a panty pic and see what you get. If she complies, then you’ve broken that barrier too and you can ask for that more through the rest of the month.
Next time she ovulates, ask for a pic of her boobs and see if she does that. If she does… woo-hoo, you’re wearing her down baby, you’re wearing her down.
Next month you’re going for pussy shots and upgrade after that to whatever your personal kink is.
Importantly, never ever ever show these to anyone else. Things have a way of coming around and biting you unexpectedly. It’s also fun sometimes to snap pictures of each other doing fun stuff once in a while too. She’s very likely going to be nervous as hell about that the first time, so delete them all with her assistance right afterwards. Keep deleting them after that, unless she wants to keep them, whereupon you forward them to her, and delete them from your phone.
And when you ask for sexts and pics, never apologize or take it back. If you ask, just wait for a reply and don’t reply to her until she replies to you. Just be patient and see what happens.
Anyway, I wore Jennifer down on this one ages back, I’m well beyond getting vanilla tits and ass photos. These days I’m totally getting pictures of her ironing my shirts.
Jennifer: lol it’s true…the shirt ironing picture is a classic. I would only ad that from a mushy female perspective I also like the purely “I love you” or “Thinking about you…hope you’re having a good day” kind of texts.
Athol: Which is to say, she likes the Beta texts and the Alpha ones. Mix and match. Chicken Monkey Duck.
Jennifer: Damnit let me get the last word! If she’s jumping you in the shower it’s all good. If she’s yelling at you stop.