It’s been an odd day. I got asked three different ways when was the right time to pull back the curtain and reveal to your wife that you’d been reading MMSL.
Anyway, it’s fairly simple. If her Sex Rank is higher than yours and you’re in Phase One of the MAP, I would completely zip it on the MMSL front and even actively seek to hide it from her. Just run the MAP and don’t talk about it. She already thinks somewhat poorly of you and revealing that you “need help with women”, just gives her hamster ammunition to frame you as a loser.
If your Sex Rank is higher than hers and you’re in Phase Three, then it’s basically up to you if you reveal or not. At this point it’s working for you and she might be mildly taken aback by the fact that you had outside help, but the fact that it actually is working will carry the day.
Somewhere between those two points it stops being a bad idea to tell her and starts being a mildly okay idea to do so.
However if she starts acting increasingly anxious and nervous because you’ve successfully become obviously more attractive than her, she may just be freaking out that you’re going to dump her, cheat on her, or already be cheating on her. In which case the reveal may in fact be a massive relief to her. “Look honey I’ve been following this plan, and the plan says to hold the moral high ground as you do it, and that’s what I’ve done.”
Essentially once you reveal MMSL and the MAP, you’ve pushed it to a de facto Phase Four. You’re stating your intentions fairly clearly that you want a proper sexual relationship in the marriage, or you are preparing to walk on her. So it is important to have your Sex Rank higher than hers when you do that. The golden rule being to never force an ultimatum on your wife when she’s hotter than you.
The only other reason to reveal MMSL is when you use it as a last ditch buying for time gambit. I.e. she’s about to punt you out of the house in the next five minutes because you are failing badly on the attraction front. This is where you can say, “Okay, okay I get it now. I’ve found this book, I’ve figured out what I have to do, I have this clear easy plan to follow, please just give me 3-6 months to prove that I can turn myself around. I’m not going to talk about doing this, I’m just going to do it.” If you’re at that point, you really have nothing else to lose, so maybe it works, maybe it doesn’t.
Jennifer: I’ve often been asked if me knowing about Athol using Game makes it less effective. I don’t think it does. I don’t see it as manipulation as much as I see it as motivation…it’s not a bad thing for me if he knows what makes me attracted to him and he does those things. Sometimes he does something obvious and almost jokingly, and I just laugh at him (in an affectionate way, not in a derisive way!). Sometimes I just tell him I need an Alpha Male for a moment lol.