You Have The Bridge Number One

My eyes are bleeding from researching blog widgets and crap these last three days. I’m fried. Jennifer is very supportive of MMSL, but I’m very much the writer of the two of us. So I threw her some softball questions and took a nap…

Having read and edited every single MMSL post over the last two-and-a-half-years, what have you learned from it all?

That I am a very (very, incredibly) lucky person to be married to Athol!  No, really…we have a very good relationship that has the lovey dovey aspects as well as the realization that a relationship takes effort, communication and time together to make it work.  I have learned about the “dark side” of people cheating on their spouse, or people putting no effort into their sex lives and growing apart.  It’s sad but a part of a lot of people’s lives, and I’m glad they have a place here to ask questions and get feedback and practical advice.  I’ve learned that it feels good to share what works for us and what we’ve learned in our marriage…even if it does cause the occasional uncomfortable conversation at work lol.  (No, coworker lady, I’m not a sex slave.  I’m not having my intimate life and marriage splashed all over the internet against my will.  Really, it’s all good…)

Do you have a favorite post?

Well the pants post is of course legendary.  Being a practical, needs it all spelled out for her kind of a girl, I also in general enjoy the reader email posts that offer the reader’s story, followed by practical advice that really works.  (action, people, not just words!)

What’s it like now Athol is full-time MMSL?

I am not used to saying “my husband is an author” yet when someone asks me what my husband does for a living.  It is pretty exciting but somewhat unnerving at the same time…the whole working for yourself/being your own boss thing is very cool and I’m proud of him, but yeah…it doesn’t come with health insurance or a guaranteed amount in your paycheck every week.  I am totally not complaining…just saying it’s taking some getting used to.  It’s nice to have him based at home rather than commuting for two hours a day, and to have him happier and less stressed because he’s doing something he’s passionate about is fabulous.

Don’t you feel exposed by having your sex life online like this?

It’s funny, I only rarely have that “oh my god, people are reading about our sex life” feeling.  I think it’s mostly because truly, I love you all…but I’m never going to be face to face with 99.999% of you!  If you were all my neighbors opening your windows at night in hopes of spying on some loud, raucous sex that would be different!  Our family and friends know about the blog and the books, but in general it’s all TMI, so they are happy for us but not hanging on every word.  Plus, I have editorial powers so if there’s something that I’m really not comfortable with, Athol will edit things down to something that’s comfortable for me.  It’s all very strange, considering that I started out as a very naive and shy wife, and that I have the “good girl” reputation at work still to this day.

What’s the best thing about MMSL?

There’s the non-selfish best thing…I’m so glad that there’s a place for people to find help in fixing, resuscitating, or enriching their marriages and LTR’s.  I’m glad that Athol’s phone dings all day with emails coming in from people who have questions or are thanking him for writing material that is helping their marriage and lives.  Then there’s the selfish best thing…It’s wonderful to see my husband finally doing what he loves to do full time, getting a charge out of helping people, and getting challenged by the questions and comments.  The interaction with readers really spurs him to think about new, different ways to help people succeed in their relationships.

Do you wish anything was different?

Lol I wish he was a morning writer instead of an evening writer!  He has his best ideas and creative energy in the evenings…so my routine is to fall asleep on the couch half an hour before he’s done writing, wake up and edit his post, then go to bed and screw like wabbits.

What’s next?

More writing, some traveling and speaking, and lots more sex.  (We have a responsibility to uphold here people…)

Athol: Lol I get to postscript Jennifer for a change! I think we’ve both grown into much stronger people. Jennifer is still a sweet natured good girl, but there’s much less tolerance for other peoples nonsense these days. Considering I’ve been writing about not letting yourself get taken advantage of in your marriage for the last two-and-a-half years, I believe I’m doing mind control wrong. Which is ironic as we get the occasional nutcase who thinks Jennifer is in need of serious rescue from my evil clutches. (We only play that game every second Tuesday.)


  1. I wish I had known all of this many years ago. Now I’m of an age that I doubt I will ever be seriously involved with any women ever again. Maybe if I was into dating grandmothers, but I’m not. I’m glad y’all learned this while you were still young enough for it to do a lot of good. And that you have shared.

  2. You guys are bona fide internet superheroes.

    Keep writing.

  3. Rachael says:

    I second that notion.

  4. Gumbyman says:

    Keep up the good work! Thanks for the input and sharing Jennifer, it’s always good to hear your side!

  5. Thank you so much. I love hearing Jennifer’s perspective on things.
    On the whole slavery/having to be saved from him stuff – the more Red Pill/Game/MAP is implemented into our marriage the happier my husband and I are, and I’ve come to realize that there are people that just can’t stand when someone else is happy. But then again you know this since you deal with it also.
    Thanks again for the positive example that marriage can be and laying out the ground work so that many of the rest of us could find it and enjoy also.

  6. pdwalker says:

    Before you guys came along, I’d lost all hope for Jedi mind control.

    Now I am mastering the dark side.

    Thank you Athol and Jennifer.

  7. I still remember that TV interview where Athol said something like, “Jennifer’s mom is worried that she’s having sex all the time and her dad is worried that she enjoys it”. Lol! It was something like that, anyway. I have enjoyed the blog, but couldn’t imagine having my own sex life right out there in public like this.

  8. Jacquie, so true. So many people in life don’t want to be happy. They just want others to be unhappy. I see this all the time. Even when they aren’t saying much you can just tell they are hoping for you to fail so they can pull out the “I told you so.” I think there are two kinds of people in the world. Those who react by looking at others and those who react by looking at themselves. The ones who think others are the cause to all their unhappiness are bound for small sad lives. Screw em.

  9. Very good! I wondered what other people in your lives thought about the book and blog.
    Jennifer seems like such a sensible, laid-back gal. I have to laugh at her co-worker’s “sex-slave” assessment!
    Also, the people who email and claim Jennifer is oppressed and needs to run away crack me up.

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