Check Check Check It Out

Following on from yesterday’s post

On the “Rule Out Medical” front, my advice to this reader was to really dig into the whole history leading up to and around the wife getting a hysterectomy. I.e., get thee to a doctor.

A few months later…

Reader: Hey Athol!

Took awhile to have enough info for a meaningful reply. The short recap was whether or not women can really have “low libido”. Wife had a hysterectomy in January. The gynecologist had placed her on a hormone patch immediately after surgery. Once we were through the healing period, I can say HORMONES ROCK! We went from sex every 7 – 10 days to sex 2-3 times a week. I had been worried about post-surgical vaginal dryness but the patch kept things wet when expected. If she forgot to replace the patch, she would get a little moody/bitchy. Sex would spread out farther. When the patch was off, she did not want sex and would be a real bitch. She even told me that she felt like this monster was inside her trying to say the most cruel things (when she was not on any hormones). In an effort to save money, my wife wanted to start using a transdermal gel instead of the patch. Sex went to once a week at best. Vaginal dryness became an issue. (Dry enough for her to say “let’s skip the fingering” when it usually “takes her there.”

In summary, I admit, sample size is only one, but my “study ” entailed a pre-hysterectomy, pre-menopausal 46 year old woman with no hormone supplement – low libido, infrequent sex, moody/bitchy/short-templered, adequate vaginal lubrication. Post-surgical with patch hormone replacement – libido significantly improved (closer to what it was 15 years ago), excellent vaginal lubrication, even-tempered (i.e. minimal bitchiness). When removed, she returned to low libido and bitchy. Transdermal gel – results were only marginally better than without gel – mild increase in libido, adequate vaginal lubrication and above normal moodiness/bitchiness.

So from this, I conclude: If your wife is mid-40’s she may, indeed have low libido AND moodiness due to hormonal ebb. GET IT CHECKED OUT. And also, if one type of hormone replacement does not seem to help, try one of the other types.

Thanks VERY much for your help! And by the way – the Forum was a great idea!  I love it!

Athol:  All this is a fabulous win. Ya’ll see how you can’t just “Game” a hysterectomy?

Plus now they both know the tune, his wife doesn’t have many excuses to use to avoid sex anymore lol. You’re welcome dear reader. You are welcome.


That’s right, I got Beastie Boys and post-hysterectomy hormone replacement therapy in the same post. I’m bigger than style bitches. I wore Ugg Boots once and started a craze. A drop of my sweat gets you laid for days. When I get a lap dance the stripper pays. I hit the juke box just right and the music plays. I’m p-p-pushing six k marital lays. But I sort the recycling just like she says.


Jennifer: Oy… he’s like that last paragraph in person. A lot. He is painfully slow at learning the recycling procedure lol.


  1. Chimpy says

    Lots of women reckon hormone replacement raises the risk of breast cancer and wont touch it.

  2. MJ says

    Good morning all- I thought it was worth it to mention that some of a woman’s desire for you could also be based on her perception of the man’s health. While running the map has great side effects for improving a man’s health, if they are potentially unknowingly struggling with their own health issues her body will be less likely to want to procreate with. Some of the vet common area of concern that can rob a man of testosterone and seriously affect the outcome of his MAP efforts are too much stress (increased cortisol or impaired cortisol rhythms), or being on cholesterol (statins) lowering drugs. Both scenarios are common and impair his body’s ability to make testosterone to a great degree and could make running the MAP or banging you wife more challenging than it needs to be.

  3. Highlander says

    This change in behavior due to hormones is precisely what I’ve mentioned about that can bring on a “Mid life crisis” in women and men. A wife in her 40’s drawing away from a husband might have very little to do with the marriage , his Alpha or Betaness or how he has conducted himself in his marriage. The medical /health aspect should be looked in all cases, but good luck with that. The idea of hormones playing such a big role that women can lose control or become unrecognizable is taboo, the third rail. It’s far easier to claim they’ve been hard done by, ” Sacrificed their lives for their family” ( somehow husbands don’t?) or “held back by their husbands and family” from “Finding themselves”….

  4. RedPillWifey says

    Oh man, how I laughed at the last paragraph. I <3 the Beasties.

    I think it does indeed make a huge difference if hormones are off. I'm personally dealing with PCOS, and have felt "off" for years until after this last pregnancy. I think maybe it kicked the levels back into place, hopefully not temporarily. Being physically active has made a huge difference as well.

  5. holdingallthecards says

    Peri-menopause and full-blown menopause are very real and legitimate mood killers. If your wife is in her 40’s, either go online or accompany her to the OB-gyn at her next checkup and ask what to expect and how to prepare. Don’t let her blow you off by giving stupid excuses like Highlander wrote about. Tell her you’ve already researched the topic, and this is not like a little case of PMS. And yes, just like PMS, women will deny they are acting like hags while they’re menopausing.

  6. Shanna says

    Hysterectomies scare the crap out of me. My MIL got one and her hormones were so out of whack she wanted to commit suicide. Thank God they got her on the right hormone cocktail and she’s back to her usual self.

    Regarding hormones: I’ve had a problem with estrogen dominance since about age 30. After adding progesterone cream my PMS got way better and my libido did, too. (You can get good progesterone cream at any Whole Foods.)

    LOL @ the Beasties. My husband is always quoting them, too!
    Me: “No, I don’t want any brass monkey and it’s NOT a sabotage.”

  7. says

    I’ve noticed you talking about the particulars of sorting the recycling a couple times now. Is your recycling service super anal or something? Where I’m at, there’s no “sorting” except to put the things that can be recycled (glass/plastic/paper) into the recycle bin and the rest (food trash, etc.) into the trash. Boom, done. The only thing that’s tough is finding a convenient place to drop it off (they don’t do house-to-house pickup, studies having shown that the fossil fuels burned by sending an extra truck around more than offsets the environmental benefits of recycling).

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