I’ve been at a marriage conference in Baltimore all week. It’s been… yeah… it’s been interesting I guess. I knew going in that I would be getting a lot of Blue Pill goodies, but at least it was going to be top shelf Blue Pill. This was a group of extremely well intentioned, smart people and I did like them, but it was agonizing how close they would come to really getting the Red Pill stuff… and then suddenly like a rubber band was around their waist, get snapped back cartoon-style to the fluffy pink pillows.
I did toss out a few Red Pill responses to questions during seminars… “musical chairs while everyone is naked” went down like a lead balloon. I think they might have called security if I had said “cock carousel” lol.
I think the one stand out point though was the elephant in the room of never once was it discussed… not even in passing… not by a single presenter… what makes a woman attracted to a man and makes her want to strip her panties off for him.
… I had a total of five different people email/facebook/forum message me the exact same message…. dude you have to put the stuff about “if you do nothing else, get into the weights room” right at the front of the book.”
Round of applause for your bad selves readers… you’re more on point about what makes a marriage work than the experts.
Anyway, I wasn’t really expecting to learn much new apart from a Beta skills refresher course, my goal was to case the joint for next year and see how a couple dozen programs roll out their stuff and look at their material. It also gets my attention when one of the presenters had received $10,000,000 federal funding to teach relationship skills in workplace settings. Though I suspect if I got federal funding, they’ll want me to stop using words like “pussy”… and I don’t think I could go on without pussy.
Okay, okay… you bring the money in the wheelbarrow, and I’ll compromise and call it “soft kitty.”
The truth is I’ve been struggling enormously with focus since about… February. Everything just caught up to me and I’ve felt worn out and empty. I injured my right elbow a few months back and that’s only just coming right now. But I’ve kind of enjoyed the perfect excuse not to exercise because Diablo 3 came out and that’s been fun for a while, but wearing out now thanks to endless disconnects. All this just as I stop nursing and go MMSL full-time. I’ve been so tired that even though I wrote two books in just over a year, I’ve struggled with feeling like a failure as revising the Primer slips away from my inner timetable deadlines. But the worse I feel, the worse my writing gets… so forcing it is problematic.
Anyway… it’s been really good to be in a room of several hundred pro-marriage professionals and yet still get this sensation of being the black sheep in the family. I have dreams about bending them all to my frame, or at least enough of them to make a serious difference, but the reality is all my smarts won’t matter a damn unless I have a six-pack abs and muscles to sell my message. The messenger is the message. I’ve always had oodles of cuddly Beta Traits, I think the last three years of my life have gotten the Alpha Traits in place, so the next thing is to really work on the physical. I’m starting to come to the conclusion that I’ve been somewhat off the mark talking about having an Alpha+Beta balance, it’s really Alpha+Beta+Physique.
Oh… Jennifer and the girls came with me. We did Washington DC and the National Mall on the weekend and then while I was in conference they did stuff all over Baltimore Inner Harbor area. We finished off the trip with Medieval Times which is essentially like watching wrestling but with horses and a chicken dinner. I have to say our Red Knight was particularly handsome and the Kay daughters were visibly disappointed when the Yellow-and-Red Knight proved to be representing the VIP seating and Red-the-handsome
took a dive was slain in a MIGHTY BATTLE. Girls liking watching boys fighting… lmao who knew?!
Jennifer is growing out her fringe (Jennifer: For those non-Kiwi’s in the audience, that’s my bangs) to get the full long hair deal. She’s in that horrible phase of just looking like she’s too poor to afford a haircut. It will look good in a few more months though. For now she’s got it pinned back in a style I’ve decided to call “The Polygamous Commune Look”.
I guess I need to tie all this up into a point…
The point is that while I have fans, friends and followers, for which I am truly grateful, I’m still running my own MAP myself. I’m still trying to get better. It’s hard work but it’s slowly paying off and when you reach a major milestone it might not feel as awesome as you think it might. Being over tired makes us all cowards and cranky. It’s okay to take some time off, but you can’t quit entirely. When you look back you do feel good about the milestones. Hopefully as you get your crap together, she follows along too. If you get stalled out, just work on a different area of the MAP.
And always try and be the guy representing the VIP seating.