Sexy Moves: Comfort and Coping

Jennifer has been taken down with a tummy bug the last few days and only is just starting to look halfway normal.

So Goofy and Groping OFF, and Comfort and Coping ON.

I don’t think I’ve made a pass at her of any kind since… er Sunday? It hit her Monday and it’s Wednesday now. Playfulness dialed way way back and pretty much letting her nap as much as she can. Basically Beta turned up to 11 doing all the chores, all the cooking, all the kid duty and making special trips for soda, soup, ginger cookies yada yada.

She had a couple of critical work related things that she stubbornly refused to let fall to shit, so I escorted her because she’d probably just get in her car and drive away dehydrated and loopy if I didn’t. Grrrr, don’t make me go all Fifty Shades of Kay on you. At least on the way back home she admitted I was right to have refused to let her drive herself.

Ate a small but normal dinner tonight, just looks tired. Only needs to do two hours work tomorrow or something. I’ll probably clear her for that lol.


So be honest, I actually enjoy taking care of her like this. Oh I don’t enjoy her being sick, I just like the excuse to turn the Beta way up and coddle her a little. It’s kinda fun. She even whined that she’d been neglecting me… which is true, because she has… but she’s been sick, so it doesn’t matter. That’s why we’re married to each other. I don’t even mind skipping the sex and getting a little pent up. It’s all in a good cause as while I’m kinky as a messed up slinky, banging nauseous and dehydrated chicks just isn’t my bag baby. (If you must try it out, I recommend doggy style…)

I can do all this total Beta stuff because it’s a temporary situation. Tomorrow she’ll be mostly better and I’ll play a 50% Goofy and Groping and 50% Comfort and Coping Game. Friday and it’s gonna to be all back to normal. She’ll go back to handling all her regular stuff and putting out for me. I’ll do all my regular stuff again. If this was a long term illness, we would have to adjust things more finely, but for a short term, it’s fun.

So keep an eye out for moments of genuine need and swoop it and deliver the Comfort and Caring. Just handle the situation and relive her of duty. When she actually needs Beta love, getting it is hitting the sweet spot, while you walking around delivering Beta overload when she doesn’t actually need that much, feels suffocating to her. So do revert to normal once the need has passed. It’s a reasonable request to be given special attention when you’re genuinely sick.

The one caveat to all this that she needs to keep a reasonable tone and ideally say thank you once in a while. Bad tempered patients should discover that the call bell is mysteriously broken. Or failing that, just tell them if they aren’t sick enough to see a doctor, they aren’t sick enough for special attention.

Jennifer:  You had me at ginger cookies.  





  1. pdwalker says

    What? Comfort and Caring when it is needed to your Missus?

    It’s true, you really do hate all women! It’s right there in print, or something.

    (yes, I’m just taking a poke at those morons who see only what they want to believe they see)

    Get well soon Jennifer.

  2. BetaTester says

    I am all for caring. However the last part is really really important; Not sick enough to see a doctor, not sick enough for special attention. My wife always has something going on either physical (upset stomach, headache, etc..) or mental (anxiety, overwhelmed, etc..) yet rarely see a doctor. I used to just pour the beta all over her for these episodes. I never saw any reciprocal gratitude for the beta behavior after she recovered. Now that I am running the MAP, she seems to have fewer episodes and they are far shorter in duration.

  3. says

    Thanks everyone. She looks and feels way better this morning.

    @BetaTester – funny how their health magically improves when you stop paying it attention isn’t it. Jennifer is the other way, I actually have to boss her into proper self-care when she’s ill. She never fakes that she is sick, she fakes that she isn’t. I play the nurse card on her lol… oh does she almost dislike me for doing that hahahaha.

  4. The Dude says

    While I don’t doubt women can fake almost anything…faking a legit illness would be hard to do. Trying to keep up the appearance of fever, chills, and everything else that goes along with it would be hard to do over a length of time. That’s why a headache or fatigue is a good excuse…because you can look the same whether you are or not.

    On another note…if you are a healthy individual it should take a legit illness to take you down. Eating right, taking my vitamins, regular exercise, and decent amounts of sleep is what I do…and other than allergies I haven’t been sick in almost two years.

  5. says

    When it gets confusing is when there are chronic problems that are real enough, but also easily exaggerated. My wife has back problems, which also make it hard for her to sleep. They aren’t imagined– she’s been to the doctor and gotten a diagnosis– but it can be a real guessing game knowing when she’s actually in pain (or, well, more pain than usual) and when she’s just trying to get me to ignore my own needs and baby her.

  6. says

    I love this. It is exactly what people need/want/deserve when they are sick, and is one of the many benefits of a good marriage.

    Hope Jennifer is completely well soon.


  7. FlyingDutchman says

    A woman pretending to not feel well is one of the toughest fitness tests there is. Sometimes there is just no way to pass it correctly unless you are a mind reader. There are not always visible symptoms to feeling lousy.

    Never cry wolf is a lesson that any red-pill women should internalize. If you’ve played the tired/sick/notFeelingWell card falsely over the years, then you have in some ways ruined your man’s ability to really pour out the beta only when you need it. To restore it, you should fess up and sincerely apologize so he can learn to trust you on this again.

    My wife played the “I’m not feeling well” card for years before I swallowed the red-pill. And it is amazing how she hardly ever gets sick anymore. This will sound heartless, but anytime she says she’s not feeling well now, I just ignore it unless its visibly obvious that she is sick or she is ready to see a doctor. I still give her breaks and nights off from the kids, but I don’t wait until she is “not feeling well”. And if she is sick, then of course, I take over her duties and pour on the beta, but I do not go there for just a “I’m not feeling well tonight” comment.

  8. says

    To solve the “cry wolf” dilemma, I think something BetaTester said above is key. He stated, “I never saw any reciprocal gratitude for the beta behavior after she recovered”. That is the test – looking for gratitude and reciprocity.

    If your partner appreciates your caring when she is sick and reciprocates when she is well, then the love and power balances in your relationship are good. If she “expects” you to wait on her, without feeling grateful, and doesn’t care for you back when she is well, then stop being Beta. Whether she is sick or not, switch to Alpha and build your value. until she respects your contributions. Unfortunately, sometimes people have to experience the misery of getting the kids ready for school while sniffling, or doing the laundry while dizzy, before they can appreciate NOT having to do those things with your assistance. Then, try the Beta again and look for gratitude!


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