Oh No, Not Again

Jennifer had a mammogram a week ago. Having been through two false alarm / benign biopsy experiences, I really don’t react with back-flips of joy when she has to have a mammogram. Asked if she wanted me to come, said she’s be fine, nothing I would be able to really do/see anyway. It’s just a mammogram.

So I timed my gym for the day with her mammogram and just pedalled particularly fast. When I was done, she was done. The Tech said it all looked fine but would be seen by a Radiologist for follow up. Great, that’s over, and we went out for lunch.

Except the Radiologist didn’t like the look of something, and she went back today for another mammogram.

This time I went. There was nothing I really got to do or see other than sitting in the waiting room. I read a book for fifteen minutes and she was back out again. Once again the Tech said it all just looks like the same calcification’s they’ve seen before, nothing to worry about. Obviously all gets to be seen by a Radiologist and follow up blah blah blah.

Great, that’s over, and we went out for lunch.

Look I know… second worse case scenario if it’s really bad they will catch something early and I think Jennifer would just say, let’s just be done with it and go the double mastectomy and reconstruction route. Lots of pain and recovery, but 6-12 months later life would be back to normal with a justifiable boob job added to the mix.

Really worst case scenario there’s a horrible slow death from cancer. I’d stay with her to the end and get through it and be strong and all that. I know I would. Being an attention whore I’d write about it and eventually find someone new. I’d be okay.

I think it was ten years ago we had the first breast cancer stare… as in idiots mailed the mammogram report to our house that said MALIGNANT. Jennifer was a bawling wreck for nights on end and I was a mess too, I just was full on coping with her being a wreck that I couldn’t really do anything. I was simply terrified she was going to die and leave me all alone with two little girls.

Anyway, we’ve grown. If it’s malignant, we just move forward and face what comes. I think Jennifer almost thinks of that first wrong diagnosis as a semi-near death experience… after that, in terms of health she’ll cope with whatever. For myself, no matter the outcome I’ll be okay. Either she’ll be totally fine, I’ll end up with a wife with a justifiable boob job, or I’ll find someone new.

So I’ll be fine.

Fine.

Just fine.

Totally fine.

Fuck.

“Oh no, not again” reference… (Geeks only!)

EDIT:  Same benign things they’re seen before. Repeat mammogram in six months.

No related posts.

Comments

  1. CaptVere says:

    Nothing much to say other than I’m pulling for you both of you.

  2. Eric Ventura says:

    I love the way you ended this. In a weird way its the sweetest thing you’ve ever written about your feelings towards jennifer. Ps. Glad they didn’t find anything.

  3. Simon Grey says:

    My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer last summer. They had her undergo surgery right away. After she recovered from that, they had her go through eight weeks of daily low-dose radiation. It’s been about fourteen months since she finished radiation, and the doctors have basically declared her to be fully recovered, so all she has left now is a minor medication regime and annual checkups.

    So, if your wife does have breast cancer and the doctors do catch it early like they did with my mom, you should be in a fairly good position. I know Jennifer having cancer isn’t ideal, but in the event that she does, the fact that she has access to 21st Western cancer treatment at an early stage is pretty fortunate.

    One thing that I would worry about, though, is a potential false positive: http://blog.sethroberts.net/2012/11/25/after-thirty-years-still-plausible-that-breast-cancer-screening-does-more-harm-than-good/

  4. JC says:

    Hoping you get the all clear soon. Not knowing is often worse than knowing.

    And great Agrajag reference.

  5. Serenity says:

    Athol, they ALWAYS turn out fine. We’ve had this same scare. Stay up all night and cry scare. They ALWAYS turn out fine.

    The people who run these things are sadists and just like to see us sweat.

    Big prayers from the Serenity household. Let us know the FINE results as soon as you get them. Please.

  6. JellyBean says:

    Mammograms are fun, aren’t they? For those of you who haven’t had one yet, just go into your kitchen, wait for two hours, invite some neighbors over to watch, then squish your boob really hard in the refrigerator door.

    Thinking of the Kays, hoping for some good news soon.

  7. Charles says:

    I hope the petunias are a good luck charm here, and that the extra mammogram was just a fluke. Wishing Jennifer’s boobs the best, and, as Eric Ventura noted, way to tell her yet again how much you love her.

  8. Athol Kay says:

    Same dense breast tissue they’ve seen before. Repeat mammogram in six months.

  9. RedPillWifey says:

    Oh, I’m so glad it was nothing. Much love to you both. If she does have to eventually go the double mastectomy route, don’t worry. I have a friend that just went through it, and got some gloriously beautiful new D’s afterward . Recovery was a bitch, but she’s very happy with the new boobs that aren’t trying to kill her. :)

  10. chuck says:

    ‘Independent review’ confirms that mammography is inefficient and harms more women than it helps

    http://www.drbriffa.com/2012/11/02/independent-review-confirms-that-mammography-is-inefficient-and-harms-more-women-than-it-helps/

  11. George says:

    So glad to hear it was negative. Our recent trip to biopsy-land was interesting. Wife and I had totally different styles of coping. She ignored it, assuming the best, and I got ready to fight it, ready for the worst. Yeah. THAT was fun. Sure wish they’d tell the husbands, look the vast majority of these are not cancer and if it is we’re pretty good at treating it. We’d have managed either way…….but I do kinda like the existing Ds.

  12. Dido says:

    Phew. X

  13. sparrow says:

    So glad it was negative!

  14. chimpy says:

    So happy its OK. At least they’re keeping a close eye on her.

  15. horseman says:

    Boss…glad it worked out. I have been clinically dead twice. Sick sinus and Long T. Last time heard the ecg alarm as I passed out. Life changing event but like Jen makes you appreciate every day as I could literally drop dead tomorrow.

  16. Wendy says:

    ugh! the stress!!! hugs to both of you.

  17. Chuck says:

    Wishing you guys the best.

  18. Killa Hertz says:

    Glad to know it’s okay. Waiting for potential bad news is the worst. Hugs to you both!

  19. E says:

    A Dr. friend of mine is not a fan of mammograms because the number of false positives and false negatives. He is bothered because MRIs are a more effective tool, but the industry is not focusing on them. Considering the issues that have occurred, you might talk to your Dr. about using them. The cost of MRIs have drastically dropped. I had a burst disk, and the total cost was only $381 (I paid 10% or $38) — yes, seriously, that was the total cost including what the insurance company had to pay.

  20. Eye of Rah says:

    I’ve been reading about you two for so long I reacted with shock when I saw the post in my email. I’m glad all is ok – what would we do without you two?

  21. Chris says:

    I don’t know if this is much help, but the AMAS test has been around since 1974, and is 95 percent effective in screening for any kind of cancer, including breast cancer. It’s $165, and is covered by Medicare. Most people don’t know about it, including most doctors, but it is quite well researched.

    http://www.oncolabinc.com/

    Basically, if this comes back negative, you have a 95 percent certainty that whatever they saw in the mammogram is not cancer. If you take 2 tests, it’s 99 percent certain. This also applies to things like melanoma and prostate cancer, which are notoriously hard to accurately diagnose with other tests.

    And, it is FAST. No waiting around for weeks for the result to come back. Also, it will pick up cancer before it is detectable by other means.

    The only catch is that it is nonspecific. It will catch any cancer, anywhere in the body.

Trackbacks

  1. [...] Athol, I read your post about your wife and the breast cancer scare. Scary stuff [...]

Speak Your Mind

*