The Married Guy’s Guide to Wife Part Three is now done!

It’s always a challenge to commit to a big project and we’re now at 60% complete on the video piece of the series and it feels great.

There was a lot in here that I really liked as content. The leadership stuff coming after learning the basics in Part One and the Relationship Momentum of Part Two just feels right.

I’m slightly behind my hoped for schedule, but we’re still moving ahead with everything. Part Four and Five will be finished in May no problem, and we’ll have a giant complete set out shortly after that. Then we start on the books and audio books. We are the busy.

Anyway…

The Married Guy’s Guide to Wife Part ONE.
The Married Guy’s Guide to Wife Part TWO.
The Married Guy’s Guide to Wife Part THREE.

 

$10 Off Code

There is currently a $10 off code for buying all five episodes in Part One. The code is MARRIEDGUY.

There is currently a $10 off code for buying all six episodes in Part Two. The code is MARRIEDGUY.

There is currently a $10 off code for buying all five episodes in Part Three. The code is MARRIEDGUY.

There’s an essentially unlimited number of the $10 discount MARRIEDGUY codes. Please do spread that around as much as you like.

 

$0.99 Rental for Episode One

Something else to note is that the rental is just $0.99 on Episode One.

 

Free Stuff

There’s a couple of extra features you can watch for free on the Vimeo page of Part One. A 16 minute video about the progression of Primer –> MAP Book –> Married Guy’s Guide to Wife. There’s also a 7 minute preview of the entire series.

 

Vimeo hosting

Vimeo is the retailer and hosting the videos.

You will need to have a Vimeo membership to buy (or rent) the videos. Vimeo membership is free and signing up is a snap.

The Vimeo FAQ for buying is at https://vimeo.com/help/faq/watching-videos/vimeo-on-demand-purchases

 

That’s about it, thanks in advance to everyone who buys and has supported us along the way.

…and now we get started on Part Four!

 

The Married Guy’s Guide to Wife 3 — Being the Strong Man She Wants to Follow – Trailer from Athol Kay on Vimeo.

Reviews of Part One of The Married Guy’s Guide to Wife

1 Part One NewWhat people on the forum said about Part One of the Married Guy’s Guide to Wife.

@Reborn – I just watched it. Awesome!

@FrustratedMan – This series makes the map books make so much more sense.

@BourneAgain – It’s been less than a week since I started listening to the audio from Part 1 in the (almost) daily commute in my work van…..and I swear as a result I’ve already started fundamentally changing my interactions with my wife. Awesome stuff. Thank you.

@Husband2point1 – I dunno about anyone else, but that Chain of Seduction, including the explanation of the iterative nature of that process was especially helpful too. The idea that she’s passively iteratively scanning me across all six categories is insightful.

@AlphaZulu – I just bought the first series and started watching. Very straightforward and easy to understand. (Where were you when I was 16 ?!?)
I’m really looking forward to the segments coming in the next few months. The Primer got me through all the basics and the topics of the future videos are more in line with what I need to work on now. Consider me pre-sold!

@ctruppi – Found your site recently and have read your books and now watched the 1st 3 vids. Great job!

@GiveMePeace – Great Job on the video series! I rented the first few so far and even though I am already familiar with your work, it is a nice tune up. The Seduction Chain- really brilliant how different aspects can be paired together which makes it easier to tackle. I love your work and will support at every step of the way as you continue to grow.

@AlphaBelle – I feel like I hear something new in every episode. Even after more than a year of coaching and being on the forum since 2012, there is SO MUCH in these videos that hits me like a lightbulb moment.

I love that people can see what it’s like to be in coaching, too. Proof that all geniuses are not boring and/or intimidating.

@Crashaxe – I love the videos!!

@HildaCorners – I keep getting new epiphanies … each time I read/watch Athol’s work I understand relationships more and more. I originally came to MMSL trying to understand why my previous 127* marriages went wrong. My first 15 minutes on the site were like seeing the dawn breaking with a chorus of angels. Everything made sense … the videos had the same effect. I can’t wait for the rest of the series.

 

Jump to the On Demand page for Part One!

 

The Married Guy’s Guide to Wife Part Two is Live

2 Part Two NewWoo-hoo for Part Two!

Part Two is all about creating positive relationship momentum as quickly as possible, to get your relationship to where you want it to be as fast as it can.

 

Six episodes running for a total of 3 hours 22 minutes.

Episode 1: Introduction to Relationship Momentum

Episode 2 : +1 to Attraction

Episode 3: +1 to Relationship Comfort

Episode 4: The Earth-Moon Energy Dynamic

Episode 5: Initiations and Probable Sex

Episode 6: Positive Relationship Momentum

 

Both Part One and Two are now available, you can jump to them here…

The Married Guy’s Guide to Wife Part ONE.
The Married Guy’s Guide to Wife Part TWO.

 

$10 Off Code

There is currently a $10 off code for buying all five episodes in Part One.
The code is MARRIEDGUY.

There is currently a $10 off code for buying all six episodes in Part Two. The code is MARRIEDGUY.

 

$0.99 Rental for Episode One

Something else to note is that the rental is just $0.99 on Episode One

 

Free Stuff

There’s a couple of extra features you can watch for free on the Vimeo page of Part One. A 16 minute video about the progression of Primer –> MAP Book –> Married Guy’s Guide to Wife. There’s also a 7 minute preview of the entire series.

 

Vimeo hosting

Vimeo is the retailer and hosting the videos.

You will need to have a Vimeo membership to buy (or rent) the videos. Vimeo membership is free and signing up is a snap.

The Vimeo FAQ for buying is at https://vimeo.com/help/faq/watching-videos/vimeo-on-demand-purchases

 

That’s about it, thanks in advance to everyone who buys and has supported us along the way.

…and we get to work on Part Three… almost right away. Stay tuned.

 

Married Guy’s Guide to Wife 2 – Creating Positive Relationship Momentum – Trailer from Athol Kay

The Married Guy’s Guide to Wife Part One is Live!

1 Part One NewThe Married Guy’s Guide to Wife Part One is done!

I know it’s been a long time coming, but we’re finally on our way with just over four full hours of video spread over five episodes. It covers the basics of attraction, relationship comfort, initiations, and outcome independence.

If you’re an old hand from reading my work, you’re obviously going to know some of the basics I cover in Part One. Just remember it’s intended as the starting point for guys with zero exposure to what I talk about.

That being said, if you watch it, you’ll start picking up some nuances that haven’t been there before. It’s about two parts Primer, one part MAP book, and two parts everything I’ve learned and polished from nearly two years of one on one coaching guys to relationship success.

I’m most excited about The Six Link Chain of Seduction model. It makes everything more coherent and practical.

 

Where can I buy it?

You can see the video page here.

 

$10 Off Code

There is currently a $10 off code for buying all five episodes.
The code is MARRIEDGUY

 

$0.99 Rental for Episode One

Something else to note is that the rental is just $0.99 on Episode One

 

Free Stuff

There’s a couple of extra features you can watch for free on the Vimeo page. A 16 minute video about the progression of Primer –> MAP Book –> Married Guy’s Guide to Wife. There’s also a 7 minute preview of the entire series.

 

The Trailer

The Married Guy’s Guide to Wife 1 — The Truth About What Really Attracts Women – Trailer from Athol Kay on Vimeo.

 

Vimeo hosting

Vimeo is the retailer and hosting the videos.

You will need to have a Vimeo membership to buy (or rent) the videos. Vimeo membership is free and signing up is a snap.

The Vimeo FAQ for buying is at https://vimeo.com/help/faq/watching-videos/vimeo-on-demand-purchases

 

That’s about it, thanks in advance to everyone who buys and has supported us along the way.

…and we get to work on Part Two in a couple of days. Stay tuned.

Testimonials – Hear what our clients and readers say about us.

CA: Try just one call with Athol, and I can just about guarantee you that you will think he is damn near psychic.

He is incredibly easy to talk to, and his ability to identify things and intuit what is happening in yourself and your relationship that you would never pick up on yourself is staggering. I was gobsmacked at what he could cold read from my situation.

His time and knowledge is easily worth at least 10X what he charges.

If the time comes that I want counseling for any reason in the future, I will use Athol. One one hour session with him was far more effective than more than 20 counselor visits for me in trying to assess my marriage and myself and identify the true problems.

IM: The benefit I got from Athol’s coaching was not creating a to-do list and checking in every week on the to-do list. The benefit that I got from Athol was from his experience and intuition. Athol helped me see what is keeping me from meeting my potential socially and professionally and develop a strategy to remove these barriers. As with everything it takes practice and I am a work in progress. I am in a better place now, it does not matter if my relationship succeeds or fails I am confident that I will be happy either way because I have the sense that I am knocking down the barriers that are holding me back. I am very excited about the future.

MN: Coaching with Athol changed my life. I’d stalled on my master’s thesis and was miserably frustrated with my wife and myself. What Athol did was untangle a lot of day to day frustrations and unfinished work in both my house, day job and thesis. I got useful direction on what to focus on. I didn’t just get coached, I also felt mentored, which made a huge difference. Now I have a completed thesis and a better marriage.

N: Athol’s book has put my marriage into perspective. I no longer feel as if I have been taken hostage by my wife. I have been given a box of tools that give me the skills to approach the problem of not getting what I want in a positive and constructive manner. It also gives me the courage to acknowledge if I should continue or not. No more panic.

JQ: Athol, I think your books have a NYT Best Seller potential. Universal theme, easy to follow advice.

JH: Athol, I just wanted to let you know I have had phenomenal results taking your subtle suggestions… It is almost comical how well a few subtle changes are working. She is coming up to me in the middle of the day and showing affection. Complementing the way I look. These are a little out of the ordinary for the previous months. I am very pleased. She is extremely happy.

MF: You had said to me last summer that the energy blockage was all the way back there, with the failure to complete a degree. You could not have been more accurate. Within a week of learning his final grade he replaced the leaky faucet, made repairs in the bathroom, purged his wardrobe, wrote letters and on and on. It was amazing. When he finished a switch flipped and he’s not only soared on his own, but is actively moving into a leadership position without our relationship.

SM: Hi Athol, thanks for the summary! The coaching session was superb. I just finished reading the Primer and now I’m starting the MAP book. Gosh, I should have read these books 5 years ago.

SA: Do coaching if at all possible. Puts your MAP on steroids!

PT: Literally within the first 15 minutes of the first call Athol was able to point something out to me I had not considered an issue. He also gave us a tool to use that has been very effective at getting our marriage back on track.

SA: So far this whole MAP process has been really positive for me and it really has brought into focus areas that I need to work on. I know this whole experience will be well worth it for my marriage, my family, and most importantly myself. I am really looking forward to starting my 12-Week coaching program!

MS: It is my highest compliment to Athol Kay to say that coaching with him averted the divorce that appeared inevitable on the horizon. Out marriage has improved markedly since the low-point in Fall 2013, and continues to progress on a upward trajectory.

LL: Athol gives me a very clear action plan and very situation specific advice. As an aside, Athol has miraculous language translation gift and can understand woman brain as much as a woman. Men, and women, if you are confused, call Athol and he will set you straight. Athol doesn’t hold punches, but what everyone needs is to be told the truth. It’s the only way you can actually change what’s wrong.

JB: We made the move, we are in the new house, and we had sex in the hot tub. Things between us in our marriage are really good. I am am fairly sure that without the resource of MMSL and the coaching with Athol Kay we would not be in this place.

MA: My book is out. I’m a published author. Little happy dance. A huge thanks to Athol Kay, I doubt lazy me would have had enough confidence and tenacity to publish had you not encouraged me.

PI: Athol is really a wonder worker. Right now I’m dealing with a FIL who’s been hospitalized for a month with post-surgical delirium, a dying cat, an off the charts PA boss, chronic instability in my employer’s funding, a teething one-year-old and a stubborn preschooler. And that whole wife with no libido thing. After a call with him I feel pretty chill and positive about the future. I’ve said it before: I’m pretty sure he’s a witch.

AV: I’ve been mapping for 18 months or so, and gone from virtually nonexistent (1X year) to 6-8 per month, which is amazing, all by itself. Thanks Athol.

LV: I started my coaching sessions last fall, just wrapping up my 12-Week session last week. The improvements in not just my relationship with my wife but in my LIFE are nothing short of remarkable- because really, that’s what you’re working on with this program, with Athol’s coaching. You’re not trying to fix her, or even the relationship. You’re fixing YOU- and that affects everything you do. Athol’s got a very clear-cut approach to it as well- what are the biggest things you need to work on this week? What will give you the best return on your efforts? Focus on those few things this week, and see whether that focus needs to be shifted next week. More importantly, at least to me, is that he’s looking to give you the tools you need to do the work you need to be doing. His coaching disrupted the slow downward spiral I was on, and showed me how to start climbing again. This was well worth the investment of both money and time- I don’t feel that I need it anymore, but if I did, I’d sign up for another round of coaching in a heartbeat and I would STRONGLY recommend it to anyone who even thinks it might possibly be helpful for them. Do it. You won’t regret it. And you’ll learn how to make your life, yourself, better.

PB: Call. Athol. Now. It is so worth it. He saved my sanity.”

AB: Nowhere, in all the counselors and therapists and pastors we’ve talked to, has anyone given me anything to hold on to that kept me from drowning in hopelessness. You reached out in the coaching sessions and gave me tangible help, something to get up each day and do, that was more than theory and ideals and moralizing.

RH: If you find yourself “stuck” in various facets of your life, consider using the 12-Week MAP as a jump-start. It is a multidisciplinary, tailored approach that is accessible to anyone. As a coach, Athol will hold you accountable each week as you jointly set goals. Having gone through the program, don’t be surprised if you find the “attraction” part of the plan working on people besides your intended target, if you have one. As you follow through with your goals you will slowly gain the conviction that things will work out, thought it may not be in the way you expected. Very highly recommend for people in all sorts of situations.

KM: Athol is very insightful. He has cut through all the details of my complex situation, and analyzed what I need to work on. Sometimes his advice has surprised me. For example, one of my first assignments was to replace doors in my home that had been damaged by my ex-husband. Once the new doors were installed, I realized how those unpleasant reminders of the past had been draining my energy away from building a new life with my new husband. I also appreciate Athol’s tactful honesty. He was frank about how unattractive my “nice girl”/doormat behaviors are to a man…without hurting my feelings.

LI: The book is exactly what I need right now in my life. It has specifically helped me to see ways in which I am the vampire, not just the victim. Humbling, but truth often is.

WE: I think the advantage of the MAP book is that it saves you a whole lot of forum reading. This forum is pretty vast and can be a huge time sink for a newcomer. The book really focuses everything quite well on what matters for a plan of action. Also, I am into bullet points and steps and such, so I liked the quick pace.

SR: I’m exhausted from marathon sex last night!

Books – The old, the new and what’s coming starting summer 2015.

What’s coming for 2015

The exciting news is after the webinar series has been completed, Athol will begin work on transferring the same content into a five part book series. Expect them to be available for sale one at a time, starting around the middle of the year, finishing with part five in the series early 2016.

The Married Guy’s Guide to Wife is designed to be an easy to understand, simple to put into action, step-by-step system of recovering attraction and rebuilding a wife’s interest in her husband. It also correctly stages the order you need to do things, avoiding the common pitfalls that can derailing all your progress.

Summer 2015 perfect 1 Part One New 2 Part Two New 3 Part Three New 4 Part Four New 5 Part Five New


Transparent 3Dcover for website ad

2013 – The Mindful Attraction Plan

A quantum leap forward in self-improvement, ease of use and practical applications of running your own MAP. Where the Primer was focused on a “Red Pill for Men” approach, The Mindful Attraction Plan knits a smooth synthesis of four years of writing into an approachable book both men and women can use.

“This is the pure, original meaning of the Law of Attraction, far away from fad books like “The Secret”. The Mindful Attraction Plan is a very neat packaging of wisdom from a number of different sources, and that’s exactly what makes it stand out. It’s simple, easy-to-use and more importantly, it just plain works. ” -Brian C Rideout “The Wild Man Project”

Buy The Mindful Attraction Plan on Amazon!


2012 – How to Answer “Do These Pants Make My Ass Look Fat?”

How to Answer, "Do these pants make my ass look fat?" and get laid like tile.

The second book published by Athol Kay, this collection of classic essays highlights some of the best posts written on his blog in 2010 and 2011. Humorous, smart, and easy to read, this book is as much fun as it is educational.

“Once again my brother has mortified his family by writing this crap.” Athol’s little sister.

Buy the Pants book on Amazon!


2011 – The Married Man Sex Life Primer 2011

The Primer

The Primer is intended to act as a basic introduction to all the concepts on the MMSL blog in structured approach. The blog is free, but it could take you weeks or even months to get up to speed reading through the first two and a half years of posts. Reading the Primer gets you all caught up today.

“Athol Kay is an eloquent sex God and has most definitely cracked the code on female sexuality.” -Susan Walsh “Hooking Up Smart”

Buy the Married Man Sex Life Primer on Amazon!

Video – Online and on demand.

Not everyone reads books and if you learn best from hearing someone talk, or watching a video, we’ve got you covered.


The Married Guy’s Guide to Wife Series

If you’re a long time MMSL blog reader and have read the Married Man Sex Life Primer and/or The Mindful Attraction Plan, you will have already come across many of the concepts covered in this series. There are however a number of important additions and clarifications from early material that are well worth discovering. For lack of a better term, this is about as close to a MMSL Primer 2 as there will ever be.

The most important improvement is the ordering of the material for someone new to Athol’s work and in a stressful situation. It is explicitly designed to give you exactly the knowledge you need, and the actions you need to carry out, exactly when you need them and without throwing any distractions in your path.

If you are new to Athol’s work, please start here.


1 Part One NewThe Married Guy’s Guide to Wife 1

The Truth About What Really Attracts Women

Core Questions: Why is my marriage floundering? It started off so good and now it’s like we’re roommates. How do I get it back to like it was at the start of the relationship?

Key Thoughts: That marriage is always a sexual relationship. Sexual relationships are driven by three primary biological drives. Understanding these drives gives you the tools you need to start recovering your relationship. Introduction to Alpha and Beta concepts.

All 5 Episodes are live! Click here!

 

There is currently a $10 discount code MARRIEDGUY for buying all five episodes. How long it lasts…


2 Part Two NewThe Married Guy’s Guide to Wife 2

Creating Positive Relationship Momentum

Core Question: I’ve learned the basics, now how do I act as quickly as possible get to the point where our relationship is good and having lots of sex again?

Key Thoughts: Relationships have momentum and your best bet is focusing on a long term strategy of increasing her interest level in you, rather than pushing for sex when she doesn’t want it. Further development of the concepts of Alpha and Beta to find the precise flavor of each she best responds to, and which flavors of each she doesn’t really care about.

All 6 Episodes are live! Click here!

 

There is currently a $10 discount code MARRIEDGUY for buying all five episodes. How long it lasts…


3 Part Three NewThe Married Guy’s Guide to Wife 3

Being the Strong Man She Wants to Follow

Core Questions: How do I get her to stop being disrespectful to me? How do I stop the fights about nothing? When she fights dirty, how do I handle it?

Key Thoughts: Most wives look to their husbands to take on a confident, relaxed family leadership role. When the husband does this, a great deal of relationship drama disappears. In addition it also starts evoking a more positive sexual interest in him. This introduces important concepts like Leadership Moments and handling the internal power dynamics of a happy marriage.

All 5 Episodes are live! Click here!

There is currently a $10 discount code MARRIEDGUY for buying all five episodes. How long it lasts…


4 Part Four NewThe Married Guy’s Guide to Wife 4

Bedroom Confidence and Responsive Sexual Desire

Core Question: How do I get her to be really, really sexual with me?

Key Thoughts: Most women have a responsive desire and best respond to an attractive man making confident sexual approaches on them. This series covers fine tuning initiations that actually work. Knowing how to make her want to push her sexual boundaries with you. How to let go and enjoy the sex more yourself. Plus how to make outside the bedroom playfulness turn into inside the bedroom fun for both of you.

Due Early May 2015 — 5 Episodes


5 Part Five NewThe Married Guy’s Guide to Wife 5

Winning the Peace and Keeping it Won

Core Question: This has been a lot of work to get here. Can you make it any easier? This feels like I’ve been doing it all alone and carrying the relationship myself the whole time.

Key Thoughts: Once a relationship is up to speed in terms of it’s momentum, it requires less energy to keep it there. Once you’ve “arrived” at the relationship being in a good place, the things that trip you up and make the relationship start heading downward, tend to be more emotional and whole life energy in nature. There is a genuine transition from trying to “win the war” in your relationship, to trying to “win the peace”. This covers the emotional struggles that you will face along the way of turning your relationship around. It’s unquestionably the most challenging part of the series.

Due Mid/Late May 2015 — 5 Episodes


Coaching – When you have a tangled mess and need a plan, accountability, or a reality check, right now.

If you’re reading this website, you typically have a big problem you want to get fixed. You already know exactly what that problem is and you’ve probably already struggling to fix it on your own. If you are struggling to beat it on your own, coaching can be the difference between success and failure.

Here’s how coaching can help you.

 

It gives you a plan

When you’re in the middle of your own troubled situation, you’re often going to be so caught up with the stress and emotions that you can’t come up with a real plan of action to fix it. Most people get locked into a mindset of continuing to tolerate whatever is wrong because they don’t know what else to do. You being really mad about something and you having a real plan to fix a problem are two different things.

Looking in from the outside, Athol is a master at sorting through tangled messes and coming up with an immediate plan of action to start fixing your situation.

 

It gives you accountability

Having a good plan is great, but it’s not the same thing as actually following through on it.

Having another person checking in on you and holding you accountable to follow through on your plan is a huge influence on success. It’s just like going to the gym, if you are going with a friend or have personal training appointments, you’re more likely to stick with it than if you’re just going by yourself.

What Athol can do is help keep you on track, motivating you and pushing you forward faster than if you just tried to go it alone.

 

Needing a Reality Check

Or maybe you feel like you’re going crazy in the middle of your tangled mess.

Or you want to know there’s a realistic hope the situation can be fixed.

That’s where the reality check of a coaching call can be extremely helpful. Athol will help sort out clarify how much of the situation is fixable by you, how much is really their problem to fix, and whether or not it can be fixed.

In most cases, the situation is fixable and knowing that it is, can be a huge boost in hope and purpose in getting your life back under control. You surge ahead rather than quitting because you’re too tired to go further.

And sometimes it’s the opposite. It’s broken beyond belief and the odds are heavily stacked against you. In almost every case like this, the caller already knows that it’s an impossible situation, but hearing an objective person confirm that can be an enormous relief. You won’t feel crazy after talking to Athol.

 

One Hour Call $149

The One Hour Call is great for triaging your situation and coming up with that initial plan of something to get started on right now. This is a great call to figure out a Plan and get a Reality Check.

If you know you can follow through yourself, this may be all the coaching you need. You’re not going to be locked into something you can’t get out of. About 60% of coaching clients just do a single One Hour Call and another 10% do a second One Hour Call.

 

The 12-Week Guided MAP $1197

The 12-Week Guided MAP starts with an in depth whole-life questionnaire, and comes up with a deeper plan of action than a One Hour Call can. Calls are weekly and are great for accountability as coach and client tweak the plan on the fly in response to how it’s all playing out. The situation can be very fluid when real change gets started.

Each week we come up with “the three monkeys” of three specific things to focus on for this week. Any more than three things to focus on and it all tends to flounder

Calls are weekly for 12 weeks, and if you started with a One Hour Call, the $149 is applied to the 12-week package. We bill $399 x3 months. If you have a critical situation and are facing some sort of time limit to get things under control, this may well be the best money you spend your whole life.

 

How are the calls done?

Calls are via phone or Skype. We can also do Google Hangouts.

 

How do I pay?

We invoice via PayPal. You’ll get an email and you can pay with any credit or debit card or your own PayPal money. You don’t need a PayPal account yourself. We never see your credit card information.

 

When are calls done? Do I have to be in the United States?

We’re in the same time zone as New York, and calls can start anytime Monday-Wednesday, from 9am to 9pm.

Calls can be from anywhere in the world via Skype, or if calling a phone internationally, we typically call via Skype to your phone with no additional charge.

 

Do you coach couples? Can we both be on the call?

Yes we do. There’s no additional charge for the One Hour Call for a couple.

There is significantly more effort for the coach with a couple on a 12-Week package, so there is an additional charge of $100 per month for couples on the 12-Week package.

 

Do you have other endorsed coaches available?

Yes we do.

Rebecca Watson is a specialist in Low Testosterone marriages, helping women display high value and set personal boundaries, coaching men in sparking their wife’s hidden sexuality.

Brian C. Rideout is a specialist in learning how to communicate effectively so you are heard, overcoming personal limitations, and personal success.

Contact us for more details on Rebecca and Brian.

 

If I do a 12-Week Package and like it, do I have to stop after 12 weeks?

We’ve found that the 12 week program is ideal for most situations. It requires a sense of commitment and motivation for the client to begin it, and that’s also a positive factor in how successful it is.

That being said, if you like it and you think there’s more you can accomplish through coaching, it’s easy enough to continue on for as many 12-Week sessions as we both think is effective. There are a handful of small-to-medium business owner clients who have continued on for over a year of coaching, having experienced positive business gains as well.

 

How do I get started?

Leave a message in the message box at the bottom of the page.

Jennifer Kay is the coaching coordinator and she will follow up with you via email and help get you on your way.

Welcome – Learn the bare essentials of what Athol is about.

Athol Kay is an innovative thinker, coach and author focusing on marriage and personal growth. Pulling from multiple disciplines, he creates simple, actionable steps to create positive change in your relationship and life.

Core Theory

Athol pulls from five separate veins of knowledge and knits them into a powerful single approach.

The first is from a biological understanding of the three primary biological “love systems” that make up our feelings of attraction, relationship comfort and sexual drive. An example of a book from this genre would be Dr Helen Fischer’s “Why We Love”.

The second is from the dating community about how exactly romantic attraction works, and how to create it. This aligns with the first love system of attraction.

The third is from the traditional marriage advice community emphasizing positive communication skills and expressions of love and commitment. This aligns with the second love system of relationship comfort.

The fourth is from the sexuality community about the actual expressions of sex men and women really enjoy the most, not all of which is exactly politically correct. This aligns with the third love system of sexual drive.

The fifth is an all-purpose general knowledge of health, common sense, basic morality and a holistic approach to life that ties everything together.

Message First, Marketing Second

Athol is fanatically driven to find “the answers” to the underlying reasons why people act as they do in relationships and life. Without understanding why people act as they do, the solutions offered will always be of limited value. That being said, theory must always translate into some kind of effective practical action that works… or it’s all a waste of time. Theory must work in reality.

What Athol teaches is strong enough that it will succeed without some kind of sleazy marketing campaign to bait people into overspending to get his core information. You will never be told a 30-page eBook is “worth $197, but just for today it’s on sale for $79”. Naturally there is marketing as its all part of paying the bills and sticking around long enough to spread the message, but at the end of the day, prices are reasonable, books are on Amazon, you won’t be screwed over.

Some History

Athol started writing about marriage and sexuality on forums in 2009, and then started his Married Man Sex Life (MMSL) blog in January 2010. MMSL has since grown to a number of books, a forum and a life coaching practice. Originally aimed at men fixing sexless marriages, it slowly widened its scope to a co-ed, dynamic approach to relationships and your life as a whole.

The move to opening AtholKay.com is to allow the full scope of Athol’s work of “everything related to marriage and personal growth” to be expressed, and allowing MMSL to revert back to a tighter focus on helping men create change in their sexless marriages. Much of 2015 will however be focused on the final polish to MMSL style material.

Athol and Jennifer

Athol has been married to Jennifer for 20 years. If Athol is the front man, Jennifer is the behind the scenes woman assisting with editing print and video, social media, marketing, coaching coordination and generally making sure Athol pulls away from his computer once in a while. They still have sex nearly every single day.

What is the MAP?

The MAP was originally called the Male Action Plan (2010-2012) but reframed as the Mindful Attraction Plan (2013). Essentially Athol refined the concept from his first book (The Married Man Sex Life Primer) and made it the complete focus of the third book (The Mindful Attraction Plan). The MAP takes all the key points of MMSL and channels them into a coherent plan of action to maximize your attractiveness and sense of self-worth. Then from that stronger personal frame, it allows you to more positively influence people to have better relationships with you.

“Running your MAP” means to start your own personal process of positive and productive self-improvement. Many people start the process of their MAP with a fixed objective they want to meet, i.e. saving their marriage, restarting a sex life, finding a new job and so on. However the further you get into running your MAP, the more you will find the true power in self-development is becoming Outcome Independent and seeing where the MAP takes you. You will become stronger and more capable than you could have ever imagined and far more often than not you reach your relationship goals when you stop worrying about them.